Did you sometimes wondered, who is your best friend? Or do you have best friend? Or are you someone’s best friend? I wondered of these sometimes...I used to have best friends during the school years, university years...used to...these friends that I considered as my best friends are in my facebook friend list... But I guessed those years are over...Is it distance? Or is it time constraint? No phone calls? No meetings? Leading to the changes in status from best friends to just friends.
Yeah...we need to move on. Peoples changes, life changes, and of course best friends changes too...I treasured my best friends, the precious moments spent and I am so sorry for myself for we are no longer in that terms, best friends. I wished I would have all of my best friends once again but I am certain that it is impossible since I am also not able to commit as a best friends. It is just unfair to only want something, knowing that you are not willing to give, only wanting...
Now, my only best friend is my husband. I have him only. I am assured that I have him only as my best friends because I commit myself to it. I devoted my life to it. So, I am proudly recognizing myself as his best friend. I do have other friends, my lovely officemates. However, I dare not said that I am their best friend because I am certain that I am not. Best friends are those who stay with you in joy and in pain. Best friends support you in any decisions that you made. Best friends be there for you as a shoulder to cry on, as somebody next to you when you needed companion most. Even with great indulgence, I just couldn’t bring myself to that term with my current friends, even if I want to, because I just knew that I can’t commit to it. I can’t give, so, I do not have the rights to want it.
Therefore, I can only now afford to commit to a best friend, my husband. I guessed most wife have the same feelings, the same understanding, the husband is the best friends, no secrets in the closet, transparent 100%. But what if, your husband did not consider you as best friend. What if he has this sort of thinking, not everything you can tell to a woman. Or, woman no need to know everything, the less they knew, the better. As long as they knew you love them, that’s it, no 100% disclosure is necessary.
To me, even though I am my husband best friend, I committed to that terms, I knew that I can’t force him to take me as his best friend and hence, treated me as a best friend. He is another individual that has his own way of thinking, has his own values, has his own paradigm. So, he is fully capable of deciding who is his best friend. Best friend share everything, no secrets, you are able to speak your mind and knowing that the other person will have the right words to say to you. Of course being a wife may entitle you to ask where he has been to, with whom he spent his time with. But being a best friend, will entitle you to be told without asking.
I am a wife. But I don’t want to be only wife, I want to be a best friend to my husband. I don’t want to ask, I want to be told or everything and anything. Yes, giving this commitment and hopes, if I am still not a best friend to my husband, and still, if he keeps secrets in his closet, I would be sad, of course... but I wouldn’t blame him. For I knew it took a great deal of trust to be telling a person about everything underneath your skin.
Therefore, I will not force, but I will inspire...I will be a best friend without asking anything in return...
Lucky I'm in love with my best friend....
Friday, December 30, 2011
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
The Shoe Shop
Today is a life-changing-experience day for me, for Adibah. We went to St Nicholas Home for a play day. The play day was held twice a month. During Miss Thelma’s last visit to our home, she had insisted that we join the play day. So, today, we were there. I was a little bit hesitating of the needs of this trip, however, looking at the sincerity shown by Miss Thelma, I just cannot resist. And I am so glad that I came. Nothing much is able to be done by Adibah during this play day as she was a little difficult for them to handle, and as for Adibah, knowing that it’s a new environment, she’s a little reserved and sleepy of course. At the end of the session, she was crying. Once I put her in the car, she was smiling back again. Hmmm…..she really knew her environment...the car is a normal environment and the play day session is a weird environment. She just knew it....
Earlier, on Sunday, Adibah is having her usual occupational therapy session. And I was again asking for the phone number of the shoe maker. I was asking because, Miss Thelma suggested that we made a shoes for Adibah. This is not the first time, I received such suggestion. However, I don’t know why, I just did not go to the shoe shop. I just don’t. And in addition to this, I was informed that the shop was at Butterworth. This untrue-fact, had caused me stop thinking of making shoes for her because I just don’t know much about Butterworth, so how am I going to find a small shoe shop...this is all excuses for not making Adibah a shoes....
And on Sunday, once I received the phone number together with the address....I just hahhhh....the shop is located at Seberang Jaya….so, there is no reason for not going there. After St Nicholas, we dropped by at the shoe shop. And this is where I had learned a so important knowledge on how to get Adibah on her feet. It is not a normal shoe shop visit....
The shoe shop is very small. We missed it. The owner of the shop asked “Kereta kaler apa? Saya tunggu kat luar...” Luckily, he really wait outside, it is just a small shop that was hidden by a few bigger shops. If he did not wait outside the shop, I certainly will miss it again and again.
Once we arrived, I saw the owner, something is wrong with his leg. From one glance, you could have noticed that something is wrong. He then, checked on Adibah’s leg....
”Hmmmm....ni tak buat exercise nih..., “ he commented.
I came in defense....”Buat jugak…..”
He replied, “ Jugak jer tak boleh...mesti buat tiap-tiap hari, tak boleh miss....exercise ja yang boleh tolong dia....saya tau, pasai saya dulu pun, tak leh jalan, setahun saya tak leh jalan, pi urut merata kat Utara ni tapi tak boleh jugak...exercise ja yang boleh tolong saya sampai saya boleh jalan la ni...”
He then teached me a method on how to exercise with Adibah. I’ve learnt the method before but I don’t know the importance of it and why I must consistently doing it. The shoe shop owner, explained it all to me...It is very true, that those who explained with experience will be giving a much greater impact compared to those who explained with just theories...He said to me that I should have come earlier. If I had performed the exercise with Adibah earlier and had her shoes made earlier, she could have walk already...Hahh....I felt so guilty to Adibah. It is my fault that she had not walk till today. It is all my fault...
Hence today, I can’t escape the feeling of guilty, melancholy...Felt like I am the saboteur of the life of my own daughter... And the fact that I have been such a lousy, bad mother. I am so positive at everything else but when it came to Adibah, I am negative? Why? Why can’t I perform well, excellent as her mother. Why I chose not to have high hope on her and instead of giving her my very best, I chose to just go with the flow. Why did I choose to give up on her?
Arghhhhh....I am so angry and ashamed with myself. Whether I like it not, I have to accept that I have done an unacceptable injustice to my own daughter. I am the one to be blame....
Therefore, I have to be responsible for what that I have done. Luckily Adibah did not know how to complaint. Or else she might issue me a lawsuit :(
Adibah....
I am so sorry…..Please accept my apology for not being a good mother, for not trusting you, for not having high faith in you, for giving up on you. I said I love you but my actions did not synchronize with my words. For that, for all, for this mihsbehave....I am so sorry and I will try my very best to make it up with you...
And to the shoe shop owner.....thank you very much for enlighten me of my duty and responsibility....
Earlier, on Sunday, Adibah is having her usual occupational therapy session. And I was again asking for the phone number of the shoe maker. I was asking because, Miss Thelma suggested that we made a shoes for Adibah. This is not the first time, I received such suggestion. However, I don’t know why, I just did not go to the shoe shop. I just don’t. And in addition to this, I was informed that the shop was at Butterworth. This untrue-fact, had caused me stop thinking of making shoes for her because I just don’t know much about Butterworth, so how am I going to find a small shoe shop...this is all excuses for not making Adibah a shoes....
And on Sunday, once I received the phone number together with the address....I just hahhhh....the shop is located at Seberang Jaya….so, there is no reason for not going there. After St Nicholas, we dropped by at the shoe shop. And this is where I had learned a so important knowledge on how to get Adibah on her feet. It is not a normal shoe shop visit....
The shoe shop is very small. We missed it. The owner of the shop asked “Kereta kaler apa? Saya tunggu kat luar...” Luckily, he really wait outside, it is just a small shop that was hidden by a few bigger shops. If he did not wait outside the shop, I certainly will miss it again and again.
Once we arrived, I saw the owner, something is wrong with his leg. From one glance, you could have noticed that something is wrong. He then, checked on Adibah’s leg....
”Hmmmm....ni tak buat exercise nih..., “ he commented.
I came in defense....”Buat jugak…..”
He replied, “ Jugak jer tak boleh...mesti buat tiap-tiap hari, tak boleh miss....exercise ja yang boleh tolong dia....saya tau, pasai saya dulu pun, tak leh jalan, setahun saya tak leh jalan, pi urut merata kat Utara ni tapi tak boleh jugak...exercise ja yang boleh tolong saya sampai saya boleh jalan la ni...”
He then teached me a method on how to exercise with Adibah. I’ve learnt the method before but I don’t know the importance of it and why I must consistently doing it. The shoe shop owner, explained it all to me...It is very true, that those who explained with experience will be giving a much greater impact compared to those who explained with just theories...He said to me that I should have come earlier. If I had performed the exercise with Adibah earlier and had her shoes made earlier, she could have walk already...Hahh....I felt so guilty to Adibah. It is my fault that she had not walk till today. It is all my fault...
Hence today, I can’t escape the feeling of guilty, melancholy...Felt like I am the saboteur of the life of my own daughter... And the fact that I have been such a lousy, bad mother. I am so positive at everything else but when it came to Adibah, I am negative? Why? Why can’t I perform well, excellent as her mother. Why I chose not to have high hope on her and instead of giving her my very best, I chose to just go with the flow. Why did I choose to give up on her?
Arghhhhh....I am so angry and ashamed with myself. Whether I like it not, I have to accept that I have done an unacceptable injustice to my own daughter. I am the one to be blame....
Therefore, I have to be responsible for what that I have done. Luckily Adibah did not know how to complaint. Or else she might issue me a lawsuit :(
Adibah....
I am so sorry…..Please accept my apology for not being a good mother, for not trusting you, for not having high faith in you, for giving up on you. I said I love you but my actions did not synchronize with my words. For that, for all, for this mihsbehave....I am so sorry and I will try my very best to make it up with you...
And to the shoe shop owner.....thank you very much for enlighten me of my duty and responsibility....
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Pimpinlah aku ke syurga
Suamiku
Telah lebih sedekad mencintaimu
Jarak masa kadangkala mengelirukan aku
Adakah aku masih yang kau cinta dulu?
Suamiku
Selama menempuhi jarak waktu itu
Bagaimana prestasiku?
Adakah aku menyenangkan hatimu?
Adakah aku membuatkan kau tersenyum?
Adakah menyentuhku membahagiakanmu?
Suamiku
Aku hanya manusia biasa
Sepertimu, aku juga mendambakan syurga
Namun pasti tiada redha Tuhanku tanpa redhamu
Dengan itu suamiku
Tatkala aku lalai dalam tanggungjawabku sebagai isterimu
Ketika kadangkala aku terlalu meminta-minta akan nikmat dunia
Menagih selalu kata-kata cinta darimu
Merayu-rayu lebih banyak masamu untukku
Maafkanlah aku
Aku cuma isteri alaf ini
Yang mudah hanyut dalam menongkah arus dunia
Namun tetap mendambakan syurga serta segala nikmatnya
Maka aku merayu suamiku
Jangan lepaskan tangan ku walau apa jua yang berlaku
Dan jangan jemu memimpinku......
AYu
Telah lebih sedekad mencintaimu
Jarak masa kadangkala mengelirukan aku
Adakah aku masih yang kau cinta dulu?
Suamiku
Selama menempuhi jarak waktu itu
Bagaimana prestasiku?
Adakah aku menyenangkan hatimu?
Adakah aku membuatkan kau tersenyum?
Adakah menyentuhku membahagiakanmu?
Suamiku
Aku hanya manusia biasa
Sepertimu, aku juga mendambakan syurga
Namun pasti tiada redha Tuhanku tanpa redhamu
Dengan itu suamiku
Tatkala aku lalai dalam tanggungjawabku sebagai isterimu
Ketika kadangkala aku terlalu meminta-minta akan nikmat dunia
Menagih selalu kata-kata cinta darimu
Merayu-rayu lebih banyak masamu untukku
Maafkanlah aku
Aku cuma isteri alaf ini
Yang mudah hanyut dalam menongkah arus dunia
Namun tetap mendambakan syurga serta segala nikmatnya
Maka aku merayu suamiku
Jangan lepaskan tangan ku walau apa jua yang berlaku
Dan jangan jemu memimpinku......
AYu
Thursday, October 6, 2011
Worries....
Do you have worries? I have so many worries….
Last week, my darling baby was sick. I was so worried….. if she was sick because it’s time for her to return back to the Creator. I was so worried even though I am so aware that this is beyond my control.
When I drive, I am worried that I may get involve in an accident and return back to the Creator. Will I be able to answer all the questions in the next life? Will I be bringing a lot of good deeds with me or I shall be bringing with me all the sins and wrong doings? Will I be proud to tell the Creator of what I have done with all the gifts, the life, the age that He had given me. Or will I be so ashamed of my own self for there is nothing good that I’ve done with my life other than wasting it for the world that I am certainly knew is only a short, tiny journey of life.
When I heard of friends diagnosed with cancer, I was worried that what if, I shall be tested with the same disease. Will my loved one be able to take care of me? Will he be there for me? Will my family be strong to hold my hand along the way? Will I be strong to face it?
I am worried of losing too. If I lost my loved one, will I be able to stand and continue living. Will I be able to cope with life without them? What will I do if I miss them? To whom shall I seek should I need love and support? Will I be able to accept the fate? That all is given to us is a loan from the Creator and that only He has the rights to retrieve it back anytime He wants. Everything that is given to you…. money, wealth, health, children, happiness….is all His…..So, He certainly has the right to take it back without prior notice…..will I survive the test of lost?
And when I’ve seen a perfect couple, a couple that have gone through 15 years of marriage life, filing a divorce, I am worried too. Will I be able to always lead a happy, meaningful marriage life? What if my loved one found someone new and so fond of her and forgets all about me. Forget of all the years that we’ve spend together. Forget that we’ve been in love? Will love always be there for me? Will he always love me? If it happens, how will my heart cope with the pain? Will my heart be broken into pieces and will it ever cure again?
Hah…..I have tonne of worries……but I have cure for all my worries….
Syukur….
To the Creator, we shall come back. For all my worries, for all my hopes, for all my dreams, I shall seek and lean to the Creator. For we need to have high faith that Allah SWT decides what’s best for us. Life is difficult, hence, I am so glad, so grateful, felt so blessed for I knew I certainly have a best place to turn to……
Daripada Abu ai-Abbas, Abdullah bin Abbas r.a., beliau berkata, “Suatu hari saya berada di belakang Nabi S.a.w., lalu baginda bersabda, “Wahai anakanda, aku akan mengajarkan kepadamu beberapa perkara: Jagalah Allah, nescaya Dia akan mengjagamu. Jagalah Allah, nescaya Dia akan selalu berada di hadapanmu. Jika kamu meminta, mintalah kepada Allah, jika kamu memohon pertolongan, mohonlah pertolongan kepada Allah. Ketahuilah, sesungguhnya andaikata sekelompok orang bersatu untuk mendatangkan sesuatu manfaat kepadamu, mereka tidak akan dapat memberikan manfaat sedikit pun kecuali apa yang telah Allah tetapkan bagimu. Dan andaikata mereka bersatu untuk mendatangkan sesuatu yang memudharatkanmu, nescaya mereka tidak akan memudharatkanmu kecuali musibah yang memang telah Allah tetapkan bagimu. Pena telah diangkat dan lembaran telah kering.” (HR. Tirmizi, dia berkata, “Hadis ini hasan Sahih”).
Dalam sebuah riwayat selain Tirmizi dikatakan, “Jagalah Allah, nescaya engkau akan mendapatkan-Nya di hadapanmu. Kenalilah Allah di waktu senang, nescaya Dia akan mengenalmu di waktu musibah. Ketahuilah bahawa apa yang ditetapkan luput darimu, tidaklah akan menimpamu, Dan apa yang ditetapkan akan menimpamu, tidak akan luput darimu. Ketahuilah bahawa kemenangan itu bersama kesabaran, dan kemudahan itu bersama kesulitan, dan bersama kesulitan ada kemudahan.
Last week, my darling baby was sick. I was so worried….. if she was sick because it’s time for her to return back to the Creator. I was so worried even though I am so aware that this is beyond my control.
When I drive, I am worried that I may get involve in an accident and return back to the Creator. Will I be able to answer all the questions in the next life? Will I be bringing a lot of good deeds with me or I shall be bringing with me all the sins and wrong doings? Will I be proud to tell the Creator of what I have done with all the gifts, the life, the age that He had given me. Or will I be so ashamed of my own self for there is nothing good that I’ve done with my life other than wasting it for the world that I am certainly knew is only a short, tiny journey of life.
When I heard of friends diagnosed with cancer, I was worried that what if, I shall be tested with the same disease. Will my loved one be able to take care of me? Will he be there for me? Will my family be strong to hold my hand along the way? Will I be strong to face it?
I am worried of losing too. If I lost my loved one, will I be able to stand and continue living. Will I be able to cope with life without them? What will I do if I miss them? To whom shall I seek should I need love and support? Will I be able to accept the fate? That all is given to us is a loan from the Creator and that only He has the rights to retrieve it back anytime He wants. Everything that is given to you…. money, wealth, health, children, happiness….is all His…..So, He certainly has the right to take it back without prior notice…..will I survive the test of lost?
And when I’ve seen a perfect couple, a couple that have gone through 15 years of marriage life, filing a divorce, I am worried too. Will I be able to always lead a happy, meaningful marriage life? What if my loved one found someone new and so fond of her and forgets all about me. Forget of all the years that we’ve spend together. Forget that we’ve been in love? Will love always be there for me? Will he always love me? If it happens, how will my heart cope with the pain? Will my heart be broken into pieces and will it ever cure again?
Hah…..I have tonne of worries……but I have cure for all my worries….
Syukur….
To the Creator, we shall come back. For all my worries, for all my hopes, for all my dreams, I shall seek and lean to the Creator. For we need to have high faith that Allah SWT decides what’s best for us. Life is difficult, hence, I am so glad, so grateful, felt so blessed for I knew I certainly have a best place to turn to……
Daripada Abu ai-Abbas, Abdullah bin Abbas r.a., beliau berkata, “Suatu hari saya berada di belakang Nabi S.a.w., lalu baginda bersabda, “Wahai anakanda, aku akan mengajarkan kepadamu beberapa perkara: Jagalah Allah, nescaya Dia akan mengjagamu. Jagalah Allah, nescaya Dia akan selalu berada di hadapanmu. Jika kamu meminta, mintalah kepada Allah, jika kamu memohon pertolongan, mohonlah pertolongan kepada Allah. Ketahuilah, sesungguhnya andaikata sekelompok orang bersatu untuk mendatangkan sesuatu manfaat kepadamu, mereka tidak akan dapat memberikan manfaat sedikit pun kecuali apa yang telah Allah tetapkan bagimu. Dan andaikata mereka bersatu untuk mendatangkan sesuatu yang memudharatkanmu, nescaya mereka tidak akan memudharatkanmu kecuali musibah yang memang telah Allah tetapkan bagimu. Pena telah diangkat dan lembaran telah kering.” (HR. Tirmizi, dia berkata, “Hadis ini hasan Sahih”).
Dalam sebuah riwayat selain Tirmizi dikatakan, “Jagalah Allah, nescaya engkau akan mendapatkan-Nya di hadapanmu. Kenalilah Allah di waktu senang, nescaya Dia akan mengenalmu di waktu musibah. Ketahuilah bahawa apa yang ditetapkan luput darimu, tidaklah akan menimpamu, Dan apa yang ditetapkan akan menimpamu, tidak akan luput darimu. Ketahuilah bahawa kemenangan itu bersama kesabaran, dan kemudahan itu bersama kesulitan, dan bersama kesulitan ada kemudahan.
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
SWEET SERENDIPITY
Since there is not much connection between my heart and my head, there's nothing to write....I just want to be strong....you never know when you're gonna fall....
LEE DEWYZE - SWEET SERENDIPITY
I ain’t got no car
And I've got one pair of jeans
They’ve been stretched too far
And now they’re weak at the seams
I can’t say what’s next
And I got nothin' up my sleeve
But I don’t lose my head
Cause it ain’t really up to me
[chorus]
And I’m doing just fine
I’m always landing on my feet
In the nic of time
And by the skin of my teeth
I ain’t gonna stress
Cause the worst ain’t happened yet
Somethings watching over me
Like Sweet Serendipity
Sweet Serendipity
I don’t ask for a lot
No nothing more than I need
Because I love what I got
Don’t need to play the lottery
I just want to be strong
At the end of the road
I don’t want to hold on
I want the strength to let go
[chorus]
And I’m doing just fine
I’m always landing on my feet
In the nic of time
And by the skin of my teeth
I ain’t gonna stress
Cause the worst ain’t happened yet
Somethings watching over me
Like Sweet Serendipity
And what will be will be
In the nic of time
And by the skin of my teeth
I aint gonna stress
Cause the worst ain’t happened yet
Somethings watching over me
Like Sweet Serendipity
Sweet Serendipity
Like Sweet Serendipity
Don’t look fate can only find you
You can’t choose for something to surprise you
Set sail without a destination
Just see where the wind will take you
You never know when you're gonna fall
But I'm not worried
No I'm not worried
[chorus]
And I’m doing just fine
I’m always landing on my feet
In the nic of time
And by the skin of my teeth
I ain’t gonna stress
Cause the worst ain’t happened yet
Somethings watching over me
And I’m doing just fine
I’m always landing on my feet
In the nic of time
And by the skin of my teeth
I ain’t gonna stress
Cause the worst ain’t happend yet
Somethings watching over me
Like Sweet Serendipity
Sweet Serendipity
Sweet Serendipity
Don’t look fate can only find you
You can’t choose for something to surprise you
Set sail without a destination
Sweet, sweet
Sweet, sweet
Sweet Serendipity
LEE DEWYZE - SWEET SERENDIPITY
I ain’t got no car
And I've got one pair of jeans
They’ve been stretched too far
And now they’re weak at the seams
I can’t say what’s next
And I got nothin' up my sleeve
But I don’t lose my head
Cause it ain’t really up to me
[chorus]
And I’m doing just fine
I’m always landing on my feet
In the nic of time
And by the skin of my teeth
I ain’t gonna stress
Cause the worst ain’t happened yet
Somethings watching over me
Like Sweet Serendipity
Sweet Serendipity
I don’t ask for a lot
No nothing more than I need
Because I love what I got
Don’t need to play the lottery
I just want to be strong
At the end of the road
I don’t want to hold on
I want the strength to let go
[chorus]
And I’m doing just fine
I’m always landing on my feet
In the nic of time
And by the skin of my teeth
I ain’t gonna stress
Cause the worst ain’t happened yet
Somethings watching over me
Like Sweet Serendipity
And what will be will be
In the nic of time
And by the skin of my teeth
I aint gonna stress
Cause the worst ain’t happened yet
Somethings watching over me
Like Sweet Serendipity
Sweet Serendipity
Like Sweet Serendipity
Don’t look fate can only find you
You can’t choose for something to surprise you
Set sail without a destination
Just see where the wind will take you
You never know when you're gonna fall
But I'm not worried
No I'm not worried
[chorus]
And I’m doing just fine
I’m always landing on my feet
In the nic of time
And by the skin of my teeth
I ain’t gonna stress
Cause the worst ain’t happened yet
Somethings watching over me
And I’m doing just fine
I’m always landing on my feet
In the nic of time
And by the skin of my teeth
I ain’t gonna stress
Cause the worst ain’t happend yet
Somethings watching over me
Like Sweet Serendipity
Sweet Serendipity
Sweet Serendipity
Don’t look fate can only find you
You can’t choose for something to surprise you
Set sail without a destination
Sweet, sweet
Sweet, sweet
Sweet Serendipity
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Ironic
I remembered....being in love......
An old man turned ninety-eight
He won the lottery and died the next day
It's a black fly in your Chardonnay
It's a death row pardon two minutes too late
And isn't it ironic... don't you think
It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought... it figures
Mr. Play It Safe was afraid to fly
He packed his suitcase and kissed his kids goodbye
He waited his whole damn life to take that flight
And as the plane crashed down he thought
"Well isn't this nice..."
And isn't it ironic... don't you think
It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought... it figures
Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everything's okay and everything's going right
And life has a funny way of helping you out when
You think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up
In your face
A traffic jam when you're already late
A no-smoking sign on your cigarette break
It's like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife
It's meeting the man of my dreams
And then meeting his beautiful wife
And isn't it ironic...don't you think
A little too ironic...and, yeah, I really do think...
It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought... it figures
Life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
Life has a funny, funny way of helping you out
Helping you out
ALANIS MORISSETTE - Ironic
An old man turned ninety-eight
He won the lottery and died the next day
It's a black fly in your Chardonnay
It's a death row pardon two minutes too late
And isn't it ironic... don't you think
It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought... it figures
Mr. Play It Safe was afraid to fly
He packed his suitcase and kissed his kids goodbye
He waited his whole damn life to take that flight
And as the plane crashed down he thought
"Well isn't this nice..."
And isn't it ironic... don't you think
It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought... it figures
Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everything's okay and everything's going right
And life has a funny way of helping you out when
You think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up
In your face
A traffic jam when you're already late
A no-smoking sign on your cigarette break
It's like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife
It's meeting the man of my dreams
And then meeting his beautiful wife
And isn't it ironic...don't you think
A little too ironic...and, yeah, I really do think...
It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought... it figures
Life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
Life has a funny, funny way of helping you out
Helping you out
ALANIS MORISSETTE - Ironic
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Happy Birthday Miss Heaven!!
Shhhhh
Did you hear that?
Did you hear that weird noises at midnight
like someone mumbling, giggling, grrrr ing...
Who is that?
Then you turn on the light and you see a smile
Is it an alien?
No...
Or is it a weird creature from the labyrinth?
No...
Ohhhhh...
It’s Adibah
My giant baby from heaven
Happy birthday my sweetheart!
They may look at you with that weird looking face...
But it’s okay because I looked at you with love, lots and lots of love
I love you and will always do, InsyaAllah….
Happy 7th Birthday, my giant baby!
May you grow up, healthily, beautifully...
Did you hear that?
Did you hear that weird noises at midnight
like someone mumbling, giggling, grrrr ing...
Who is that?
Then you turn on the light and you see a smile
Is it an alien?
No...
Or is it a weird creature from the labyrinth?
No...
Ohhhhh...
It’s Adibah
My giant baby from heaven
Happy birthday my sweetheart!
They may look at you with that weird looking face...
But it’s okay because I looked at you with love, lots and lots of love
I love you and will always do, InsyaAllah….
Happy 7th Birthday, my giant baby!
May you grow up, healthily, beautifully...
Thursday, August 25, 2011
The Moon and The Star
21 Sept 1996 was Mr Moon and Miss Star first date. Miss Star had noticed Mr Moon for quite some time as Mr Moon loved jogging by the route near Miss Star’s planet. However, Mr Moon only noticed Miss Star after the pencil box incident. And a few more other incidents that happened around the earth and the sun, resulted with them getting closer.
Despite the fact that Mr Moon did not meet Miss Star’s prince charming criteria and Miss Star, did not really qualify as Mr Moon’s sweet-long-await-dream-princess, they fell in love. Mr Moon was very much In love with Miss Star. He was willing to give up everything and anything for Miss Star. He even transformed from a not-so-and-don’t-know-how-to-be-romantic person to the most-romantic person on the earth and the sun. And he could even draft a poetry for Miss Star :) Miss Star was very happy.
Thus, Mr Moon proposed to Miss Star to become his first wife. Although Miss Star loves Mr Moon, she was not so sure about marriage as she felt like she got thousand of things that she still need to do on earth before getting married. However, Miss Star was firm with the decision after Miss Star’s mom told her that Mr Moon was the perfect candidate that Miss Star could not afford to lose.
Therefore, Mr Moon and Miss Star get married on 26th Aug 2000. Miss Star cried on her weeding day because she realized that she could no longer always be with her family. She was also afraid of the fact that she had to dedicate her life to her husband. Poor Miss Star...her tears ruined her make up.....
Although Mr Moon and Miss Star loved each other, they often fight and quarrel and the frequency of this event, increased after marriage. Fortunately, Mr Moon was a very patient partner.
When Miss Star get angry, Mr Moon will be quiet.
When Miss Star cried, Mr Moon will be quiet again.
When Miss Star upset, Mr Moon will again be very quiet.
Due to this circumstances, Miss Star then get tired...
The journey of Mr Moon and Miss Star continued with the born of their son, Mr Phlegmatic. If you find Mr Moon having the personality of a calm-patient-sweet person, Mr Phlegmatic is a more calm-more patient-more sweet person. This was not a surprised as Mr Phlegmatic was a carbon-copy and the better version of Mr Moon. Only that Mr Phlegmatic is too calm and often mistaken as too slow. Mr Phlegmatic join the group of Mr Moon and Miss Star on 24 May 2001.
So now, there are Mr Moon, Miss Star and Mr Phlegmatic in the house on earth. Along the journey, Mr Moon and Miss Star frequency of fighting had gone really low. The frequency is really reduced until Mr Moon and Miss Star were wondering on whether is it because
a) life is getting boring until there is nothing to be debate about or
b) because they finally understood each other very well or
c) it is just simply because Miss Star is getting older and having less energy to fight.
Hence, their life is more stable and peace and prosperous.
But this environment did not last for long, on 6 Sep 2004, Miss Star delivered another baby. It’s a girl, Miss Heaven. She is called Miss Heaven because of her incapability to hear and to see the world.
(Note: If you can’t enjoy the world, it means, you will go straight to heaven once you leave the world)
Since, Miss Heaven was an unexpected, special gift to Mr Moon and Miss Star, for a couple of years Mr Moon and Miss Star was very busy fitting, squeezing, and adapting to both Mr Phlegmatic and Miss Heaven.
Today, Mr Moon and Miss Star had been married for 11 years. Mr Moon and Miss Star had a mutual understanding on their dreams and path of life. They had decided on the plan and the sacrifices that they had to make in order to achieve their dreams.
Mr Moon, in order to achieve the dream, is now living somewhere else, coping with his job. He is very busy coping with his work to realize the plan and dream and to make sure that his group had enough to eat, to spend and to live, while he is climbing the ladder towards the dream. Can’t always be there for his love, Miss Star is one of the sacrifices that he can’t avoid.
Miss Star is now in the mode of a relaxing and going through a happy, too normal and too much spare time that leading to boredom life. Miss Star top priority is now Mr Phlegmatic and Miss Heaven. Hence, anything that Miss Star wishes to do, she must make sure that Mr Phlegmatic and Miss Heaven is not neglected.
Mr Phlegmatic is now the body guard of Miss Star. His rules is more stringent than Mr Moon. Wherever and whenever Miss Star wished to go and to do must be reported to him.
Miss Heaven, despite of her incapability to see and to hear, had become the night watch for the group. She will sleep in the day and will stay awake at night together with a giant yellow snail and a giant red ant to make sure that the group was safe at night. So, at night, Miss Star is having a giant baby, giant snail and giant ant to protect the colony.
With this, Mr Moon and Miss Star life was complete. Even though, their productivity is really slow, the body guard (Mr Phlegmatic) and the night watch (Miss Heaven) really colored their life.
Hence, Miss Star is no longer wishing for the stars and is very grateful to the Master of the Universe for lending her Mr Moon, Mr Phlegmatic and Miss Heaven to accompany her in this short journey of life. She wishes nothing more than a reunion of her, Mr Moon, Mr Phlegmatic and Miss Heaven in the eternity life after death in heaven.
To:
Mr Moon and Miss Star – Happy Anniversary!!
Despite the fact that Mr Moon did not meet Miss Star’s prince charming criteria and Miss Star, did not really qualify as Mr Moon’s sweet-long-await-dream-princess, they fell in love. Mr Moon was very much In love with Miss Star. He was willing to give up everything and anything for Miss Star. He even transformed from a not-so-and-don’t-know-how-to-be-romantic person to the most-romantic person on the earth and the sun. And he could even draft a poetry for Miss Star :) Miss Star was very happy.
Thus, Mr Moon proposed to Miss Star to become his first wife. Although Miss Star loves Mr Moon, she was not so sure about marriage as she felt like she got thousand of things that she still need to do on earth before getting married. However, Miss Star was firm with the decision after Miss Star’s mom told her that Mr Moon was the perfect candidate that Miss Star could not afford to lose.
Therefore, Mr Moon and Miss Star get married on 26th Aug 2000. Miss Star cried on her weeding day because she realized that she could no longer always be with her family. She was also afraid of the fact that she had to dedicate her life to her husband. Poor Miss Star...her tears ruined her make up.....
Although Mr Moon and Miss Star loved each other, they often fight and quarrel and the frequency of this event, increased after marriage. Fortunately, Mr Moon was a very patient partner.
When Miss Star get angry, Mr Moon will be quiet.
When Miss Star cried, Mr Moon will be quiet again.
When Miss Star upset, Mr Moon will again be very quiet.
Due to this circumstances, Miss Star then get tired...
The journey of Mr Moon and Miss Star continued with the born of their son, Mr Phlegmatic. If you find Mr Moon having the personality of a calm-patient-sweet person, Mr Phlegmatic is a more calm-more patient-more sweet person. This was not a surprised as Mr Phlegmatic was a carbon-copy and the better version of Mr Moon. Only that Mr Phlegmatic is too calm and often mistaken as too slow. Mr Phlegmatic join the group of Mr Moon and Miss Star on 24 May 2001.
So now, there are Mr Moon, Miss Star and Mr Phlegmatic in the house on earth. Along the journey, Mr Moon and Miss Star frequency of fighting had gone really low. The frequency is really reduced until Mr Moon and Miss Star were wondering on whether is it because
a) life is getting boring until there is nothing to be debate about or
b) because they finally understood each other very well or
c) it is just simply because Miss Star is getting older and having less energy to fight.
Hence, their life is more stable and peace and prosperous.
But this environment did not last for long, on 6 Sep 2004, Miss Star delivered another baby. It’s a girl, Miss Heaven. She is called Miss Heaven because of her incapability to hear and to see the world.
(Note: If you can’t enjoy the world, it means, you will go straight to heaven once you leave the world)
Since, Miss Heaven was an unexpected, special gift to Mr Moon and Miss Star, for a couple of years Mr Moon and Miss Star was very busy fitting, squeezing, and adapting to both Mr Phlegmatic and Miss Heaven.
Today, Mr Moon and Miss Star had been married for 11 years. Mr Moon and Miss Star had a mutual understanding on their dreams and path of life. They had decided on the plan and the sacrifices that they had to make in order to achieve their dreams.
Mr Moon, in order to achieve the dream, is now living somewhere else, coping with his job. He is very busy coping with his work to realize the plan and dream and to make sure that his group had enough to eat, to spend and to live, while he is climbing the ladder towards the dream. Can’t always be there for his love, Miss Star is one of the sacrifices that he can’t avoid.
Miss Star is now in the mode of a relaxing and going through a happy, too normal and too much spare time that leading to boredom life. Miss Star top priority is now Mr Phlegmatic and Miss Heaven. Hence, anything that Miss Star wishes to do, she must make sure that Mr Phlegmatic and Miss Heaven is not neglected.
Mr Phlegmatic is now the body guard of Miss Star. His rules is more stringent than Mr Moon. Wherever and whenever Miss Star wished to go and to do must be reported to him.
Miss Heaven, despite of her incapability to see and to hear, had become the night watch for the group. She will sleep in the day and will stay awake at night together with a giant yellow snail and a giant red ant to make sure that the group was safe at night. So, at night, Miss Star is having a giant baby, giant snail and giant ant to protect the colony.
With this, Mr Moon and Miss Star life was complete. Even though, their productivity is really slow, the body guard (Mr Phlegmatic) and the night watch (Miss Heaven) really colored their life.
Hence, Miss Star is no longer wishing for the stars and is very grateful to the Master of the Universe for lending her Mr Moon, Mr Phlegmatic and Miss Heaven to accompany her in this short journey of life. She wishes nothing more than a reunion of her, Mr Moon, Mr Phlegmatic and Miss Heaven in the eternity life after death in heaven.
To:
Mr Moon and Miss Star – Happy Anniversary!!
Thursday, August 18, 2011
Balance?
Always I’ve been thinking on how to align life, between dunia and akhirat? How to be balance? How to perform well in both? Or should we only be the best for akhirat and leave out dunia? Be the best for akhirat because that is compulsory and for dunia, is only optional? How should we do it? Can we be wanting both, dunia and akhirat. Can the dunia activities also leading to akhirat and vice versa? Can both be synergize?
The answer is yes. I’ve seen people that perform well, dunia and akhirat. It is difficult to explain this in words until I’ve read the books written by Prof Dr Muhd Kamil Ibrahim and Dr Ridzwan Bakar. Thank you very much Norhidayah for sharing these valuable, resourceful books that to me is able to describe how to be excellent, dunia dan akhirat.
Hence, below are the words written by Prof Dr Muhd Kamil Ibrahim, in one of the books “Bila pintu hati terbuka” ...
"Mulai hari ini – jika anda mahu mendengar nasihat saya – saya mahu anda bangun bersolat malam, minta ampun, bertaubat dan berdoa kepada-Nya. ALLAH telah berjanji akan memakbulkan segala pemintaan yang kita mohon dengan syarat kita lakukan dengan penuh keikhlasan, dalam ketakutan dan mempercayai yang DIA Maha Berkuasa. Jika kita gagal sekalipun, kita akan reda kerana kita sepatutnya mempercayai yang ALLAH lebih tahu apa yang tidak kita ketahui.
Pergantungan kepada ALLAH merupakan kunci kepada kekuatan dalaman seseorang insan".
Yes, that is the key, pergantungan kepada ALLAH. That will lead the way to be excellent in both dunia and akhirat...InsyaALLAH...
The answer is yes. I’ve seen people that perform well, dunia and akhirat. It is difficult to explain this in words until I’ve read the books written by Prof Dr Muhd Kamil Ibrahim and Dr Ridzwan Bakar. Thank you very much Norhidayah for sharing these valuable, resourceful books that to me is able to describe how to be excellent, dunia dan akhirat.
Hence, below are the words written by Prof Dr Muhd Kamil Ibrahim, in one of the books “Bila pintu hati terbuka” ...
"Mulai hari ini – jika anda mahu mendengar nasihat saya – saya mahu anda bangun bersolat malam, minta ampun, bertaubat dan berdoa kepada-Nya. ALLAH telah berjanji akan memakbulkan segala pemintaan yang kita mohon dengan syarat kita lakukan dengan penuh keikhlasan, dalam ketakutan dan mempercayai yang DIA Maha Berkuasa. Jika kita gagal sekalipun, kita akan reda kerana kita sepatutnya mempercayai yang ALLAH lebih tahu apa yang tidak kita ketahui.
Pergantungan kepada ALLAH merupakan kunci kepada kekuatan dalaman seseorang insan".
Yes, that is the key, pergantungan kepada ALLAH. That will lead the way to be excellent in both dunia and akhirat...InsyaALLAH...
Friday, July 8, 2011
Unfaithful partner
Yesterday, at Mix FM, JD and Dilly were talking about unfaithful partner. They were talking about this in relation to Cheryl Cole, who would like to re-unite with her ex-husband Ashley. Her husband cheated on her, leading to a divorce. So, the debate is on whether you would accept and give a 2nd chance to an unfaithful partner or totally say no to a cheating partner.
From my personal point of view, a husband and wife, both, as life partner, should certainly and very much mandatory in need of the faithful and loyal value. It is among the values that pillar a marriage. Of course....how to share your life with a person that you can’t trust? You need to have this believe that your life partner is being faithful to you and vice versa in order to lead a healthy-prosperous marriage life. I have this mind setting that planted in the neurons in my brain that once a couple committed to a marriage, it’s like having speechless words that you can feel, deep in your heart, let’s love and trust each other, live together and share everything.
With this paradigm, will cheat / being unfaithful acceptable? I don’t think anybody like to be cheated. And of course, getting cheated by your most trusted person will certainly cause you great sorrow. But then, for Muslims, the man can marry 4 women, with terms and conditions applied. Thus, the guy will then said, “Hey, I’m not cheating…. I am fulfilling my role as an eligible man to have more than one wife.” So, how do you react to this?
Hmmmmm...let’s put in a case study using your imagination. You are the first wife. Your husband is having an intention to marry another woman. The condition of this case is your husband is an eligible man and you did not wrote a MOU before your wedding saying that your husband will not marry another woman as long as you are able to perform your task and responsibility as a wife. In other words, you do not have strong reason to say no to your husband’s intention. So, the question is would you like your husband to be frank with you, tell you straight in the face that he would like to marry another woman before he start dating? Hence, he is not cheating because you actually know about it. Will you feel better about it?
Or because it hurt so much to know that you need to share a husband that you feel like it is better for him not to tell you. Because once you knew, the pain will commence? And because it hurt so much that you don’t want him to tell you about it and pretend not to know about it, is a much easier situation for you to handle?
I don’t know the answer too. Muzukashi neh....to all wife, not to worry and let’s don’t further elaborate the situation. I strongly believe that if you are chosen to be tested, it means you certainly have the capability to tackle the difficulties and test assigned to you. Life is short, so don’t spend it being worried sick and suspicious all the time.
The above case is not the worst case scenario. The worst will be, a married man having an affair with a married woman, vice versa… This is called big time, totally unacceptable, unforgiven, unbearable cheating.
But still it happened around us...why?
Again, case study, utilizing the power of your mind, activating the R-hemisphere preferences in your brain.
You are a married woman, and you have a living husband. But your husband is a wooden stool. You can sit on it but not too comfortable. Often you have backache because you can’t relax your back. In addition to this, because it is wooden, it is so rigid and not flexible. Then, at your work place there is a guy who is like a massage chair, who had his eye on you. Totally fallen for you. You are very comfortable with him. He knew how to take care of you. He knew exactly how you feel and often help you to ease your burden at work. A massage chair, totally not a comparison to a wooden stool. So, you are having internal conflict, how not to fall head over heels to this guy. He is the man of your dream. And back at home...a wooden stool...
Ladies, regardless of how the situation is, cheating wife is not acceptable, for whatever reason. For example, your husband is a illegal, unprofessional wrestler, he hit you everyday. So, you felt like you got reason to cheat on him. No, you are not eligible. You can't use this situation as an excuse.
Well, of course I did not say that you shall need to accept it, as it is and suffer your whole life. What you need to do, is first to get rid of him, then only you'll find another man.
For the case of the wooden stoll...you will say, ohhhh come on, he is a wooden stool...and how to say no to a massage chair? Well, yes, it is a temptation that is difficult to resist. But still life is about making choices. You are what you choose. And trust me, a woman was born with an element of loyal inside you. You are full of this element that will gurantee that you won't happy by neglecting this element because its in you.
Come back to the main topic, will you accept and forgive a cheating partner?
Everybody makes mistake. You may be blinded on a massage chair for a while. But then when there is no electricity, the massage chair is not functioning. And it is too big, so it is not mobile. You start missing your wooden stool. You want your wooden stool back. You want a second chance.
What will the wooden stool say? Maybe....
A) Wooden stool will be able to forgive and forget. Because he love you so much and he is not able to hate you. After he done the soul searching, he realized that, this will not happen if he can be both a wooden stool and a massage chair for you. Hence, he took accountability on what that had happened. Furthermore, he was thinking of the children. He knew the children would certainly want the parents to stay together. So, with all these reasons, he gave a second chance.
B) He was so hurt and hate it very much when he think of you being with another guy. This is something that he felt he can’t tolerate. So, he is having this thinking that enough is enough and don’t appear in front of me anymore. No second chance....
Life is full of choices, so choose wisely for you are responsible for everything that you chose :)
And when life gets harder, choosing gets harder, being faithful gets harder, there is always the Almighty for you to lean to, for you to ask, for you to refer to. For every question there’s an answer, for every obstacle, there is solution. So, don't worry, be happy!
AYu
From my personal point of view, a husband and wife, both, as life partner, should certainly and very much mandatory in need of the faithful and loyal value. It is among the values that pillar a marriage. Of course....how to share your life with a person that you can’t trust? You need to have this believe that your life partner is being faithful to you and vice versa in order to lead a healthy-prosperous marriage life. I have this mind setting that planted in the neurons in my brain that once a couple committed to a marriage, it’s like having speechless words that you can feel, deep in your heart, let’s love and trust each other, live together and share everything.
With this paradigm, will cheat / being unfaithful acceptable? I don’t think anybody like to be cheated. And of course, getting cheated by your most trusted person will certainly cause you great sorrow. But then, for Muslims, the man can marry 4 women, with terms and conditions applied. Thus, the guy will then said, “Hey, I’m not cheating…. I am fulfilling my role as an eligible man to have more than one wife.” So, how do you react to this?
Hmmmmm...let’s put in a case study using your imagination. You are the first wife. Your husband is having an intention to marry another woman. The condition of this case is your husband is an eligible man and you did not wrote a MOU before your wedding saying that your husband will not marry another woman as long as you are able to perform your task and responsibility as a wife. In other words, you do not have strong reason to say no to your husband’s intention. So, the question is would you like your husband to be frank with you, tell you straight in the face that he would like to marry another woman before he start dating? Hence, he is not cheating because you actually know about it. Will you feel better about it?
Or because it hurt so much to know that you need to share a husband that you feel like it is better for him not to tell you. Because once you knew, the pain will commence? And because it hurt so much that you don’t want him to tell you about it and pretend not to know about it, is a much easier situation for you to handle?
I don’t know the answer too. Muzukashi neh....to all wife, not to worry and let’s don’t further elaborate the situation. I strongly believe that if you are chosen to be tested, it means you certainly have the capability to tackle the difficulties and test assigned to you. Life is short, so don’t spend it being worried sick and suspicious all the time.
The above case is not the worst case scenario. The worst will be, a married man having an affair with a married woman, vice versa… This is called big time, totally unacceptable, unforgiven, unbearable cheating.
But still it happened around us...why?
Again, case study, utilizing the power of your mind, activating the R-hemisphere preferences in your brain.
You are a married woman, and you have a living husband. But your husband is a wooden stool. You can sit on it but not too comfortable. Often you have backache because you can’t relax your back. In addition to this, because it is wooden, it is so rigid and not flexible. Then, at your work place there is a guy who is like a massage chair, who had his eye on you. Totally fallen for you. You are very comfortable with him. He knew how to take care of you. He knew exactly how you feel and often help you to ease your burden at work. A massage chair, totally not a comparison to a wooden stool. So, you are having internal conflict, how not to fall head over heels to this guy. He is the man of your dream. And back at home...a wooden stool...
Ladies, regardless of how the situation is, cheating wife is not acceptable, for whatever reason. For example, your husband is a illegal, unprofessional wrestler, he hit you everyday. So, you felt like you got reason to cheat on him. No, you are not eligible. You can't use this situation as an excuse.
Well, of course I did not say that you shall need to accept it, as it is and suffer your whole life. What you need to do, is first to get rid of him, then only you'll find another man.
For the case of the wooden stoll...you will say, ohhhh come on, he is a wooden stool...and how to say no to a massage chair? Well, yes, it is a temptation that is difficult to resist. But still life is about making choices. You are what you choose. And trust me, a woman was born with an element of loyal inside you. You are full of this element that will gurantee that you won't happy by neglecting this element because its in you.
Come back to the main topic, will you accept and forgive a cheating partner?
Everybody makes mistake. You may be blinded on a massage chair for a while. But then when there is no electricity, the massage chair is not functioning. And it is too big, so it is not mobile. You start missing your wooden stool. You want your wooden stool back. You want a second chance.
What will the wooden stool say? Maybe....
A) Wooden stool will be able to forgive and forget. Because he love you so much and he is not able to hate you. After he done the soul searching, he realized that, this will not happen if he can be both a wooden stool and a massage chair for you. Hence, he took accountability on what that had happened. Furthermore, he was thinking of the children. He knew the children would certainly want the parents to stay together. So, with all these reasons, he gave a second chance.
B) He was so hurt and hate it very much when he think of you being with another guy. This is something that he felt he can’t tolerate. So, he is having this thinking that enough is enough and don’t appear in front of me anymore. No second chance....
Life is full of choices, so choose wisely for you are responsible for everything that you chose :)
And when life gets harder, choosing gets harder, being faithful gets harder, there is always the Almighty for you to lean to, for you to ask, for you to refer to. For every question there’s an answer, for every obstacle, there is solution. So, don't worry, be happy!
AYu
Friday, June 24, 2011
Hobby = No Oscar = Yes
I now have a new hobby, visiting Korea and being with Oscar. Every day, I see Oscar. I listen to Oscar. And as a result, I am addicted to Oscar. I think I really like him, for now. However, then I came to realize, hobby by definition from the mobile dictionary is something a person enjoys doing (usually / frequently) in his / her spare time and not for pay. Not for pay is correct, Oscar did not pay me to listen or to see him every day. Unfortunately, doing it in his / her spare time is incorrect. I see him all the time. Hence, I am confused. I am confused on 2 things, is this a hobby and why do I have so much of spare time. Why is my time are now all spare? See....confused already.
Well, although I am confused, I am not that clueless. In fact, I am so aware of the time spending attitude and behavior that I am behaving now. In short, this is not a hobby, this is called wasting time. OMG...
In the earlier phase of my life, wasting time is the least activity that I’ve done. I am sure of this since, I am very busy doing the time management things to make sure I’ve done and successfully completed my tasks.
In my school years, I love reading storybooks even though I spend less time reading school textbooks :) And during school holidays, I was busy helping mom selling nasi lemak and after that, as usual basuh pinggan.
In the university years, I am busy coping with studies and being in love. Totally, no wasting time activities. Being in love is not under the category of wasting time. Being in love is under the category of fulfilling the nature’s law :) while investing for future and lifelong partnership.
In my early work life, I am at the busiest. Coping with work, with family. Only 2 items but so complicated. At work, I need to carefully do the time management or else will be working like 24 hours. You have a long list of things to do and less time to do it. And some more under high pressure as all the things to be done quick, complete, meticulously and of course you have to ensure that the results is excellent. During these years, I think I cried a lot. I have hard time, coping with a hectic workplace and coping with my partner. Well, you know the-aligning-values-expectations-hope-with-a-new-too-close-intimate-living-thing-on-earth = husband. Those years are really challenging. And those years are the precious years that I think I have learnt the most. No regrets.
Okay, let’s not continue pushing the reverse button. Now, I have lots of time. Since it is a lot, wasting some of it will not be hazardous, isn’t? But the problem now arise as I am not wasting some of it, I am wasting a lot of it. Minna-san (frens), I am aware of this and still looking for corrective action. Thus, today, I am proudly announcing (as if this is something to be brag about !!) that I am issuing myself a corrective action request. The non conformity in the corrective action request written as
“Failure to make full use of time. Current time spending is not acceptable and not beneficial to own self development , family and organization. The failure may resulted with shrinkage of mind, as the food for mind is now only Korea and Oscar.”
In a system that I comply and apply previously, once corrective action is issued, the person receiving the corrective action request shall have 7 days to answer and reply. So, I have 7 days to put a corrective and preventive actions plan and to ensure that the nonconformity will not re-occur. Good luck to me!!
Note: Tall + rich + handsome = Oscar
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Touched.....
A korean song from the drama - My girlfriend is Gumiho that touched me, deep.....
I still don't understand love
So, I'm unable to get closer
But why my silly heart keep pounding
I come across you again and again
I just can't escape
Towards this helpless love
My heart hurt endlessly
A day has passed
All I think about is you
The pitiful and foolish me
What should I do
What am I going to do
My heart hurt so much
From this helpless love
I still don't understand love
So, I'm unable to get closer
But why my silly heart keep pounding
I come across you again and again
I just can't escape
Towards this helpless love
My heart hurt endlessly
A day has passed
All I think about is you
The pitiful and foolish me
What should I do
What am I going to do
My heart hurt so much
From this helpless love
Saturday, June 4, 2011
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
Let's happily and cheerfully go on diet ;)
Recently, my dear life partner often asked us to go jogging. Jogging......I never like jogging however, after few series of jogging (but actually more walking) activities, I felt something. I felt that I’m heavy and I could only jog for less than a few centimetres (even not meters to illustrate on how bad I am at jogging). How frustrating and irritating?
How come it not be irritating....while I was so in very short-breath, like almost end-of-life and needing CPR, there’s an uncle, at the age of almost 60 years old, jog passed through me. Then, there’s an aunty, like in late 40s, also passing through me, happily, breathing easily. Gosh.....I am so ashamed of myself. What happened to my fitness level.....hello......fitness? Hello........
I hate to admit it but I just could not deny it, I am not fit and overweight.
How could I let this happen? How could I be so cruel to my own body? Since I like to dress up, how could I do nothing about it and just accepted it as it is?
Number 1 fact
This is the heaviest weight in my life. I’ve never been to this weight even when I’m pregnant.
Number 2 fact
Eating, to me is an entertainment. I felt so delightful and overwhelming only by talking about food and when eating.... I really could do the eating, loosing myself in the food. The feeling is so great. It’s like the saying, diamond is a girl best friend. But for my case, food is my best friend and eating is one of my happiness. Even when I already fall asleep and then you wake me up in the middle of the night, telling me, hey let’s eat burger, I will just wake up and eat the burger, delightfully. In other words, it is very difficult for me to refuse eating and to reject an eating invitation. It’s a temptation that I can’t resist....and without food I’ll be depressed and feeling like my life is a misery and is over.
Hence, having this sort of thinking, dieting is never the word that appeared in my life. I may say it out loud that I want to go on diet, but I was never serious about it.
However, now, I am also certain of a few things.
1) I don’t want my weight to continue increasing. And I don’t want my BMI to be at the overweight column.
2) I want to be fit and I want to be able to jog happily for at least half kilometer.
3) I want to easily shop for clothing.
4) I want to see me in fit body which means without the spare tyre and visible excessive fat that certainly won’t make you pretty in your very own eyes.
Thus, I need commitment plus with high consistency and persistence to start a new daily menu. Since I am so passionate about eating, skipping meals will certainly not work for me. So, I shall first try to control my food consumption and to be selective in food choices. This is called smart eating :) Therefore, initially, I shall try this out. I need to divert my love for food to make me healthy instead of making me obesity. Love is good but still overdosed in love is toxic.
Frens.....fightin!!
Below are the list of 11 choices of food that is good for your diet that I extracted from Yahoo. Thanks Yahoo ;)
Yogurt
Mmmm. This creamy, tangy snack is loaded with calcium -- and studies show that calcium may curtail weight gain by hindering the absorption of fat in the small intestine. Check out these other good eats that are bursting with calcium.
Good Sources of Calcium
How much calcium you need, and why, plus calcium-rich foods
Benefits of Calcium
Calcium is essential for strong bones and teeth, and it helps prevent arthritis. But that's not all this mineral is good for. Calcium helps your brain communicate with your nerves and regulates blood pressure, and it may reduce the symptoms of PMS and the risk of colon cancer.
Recommended Amount: How Much You Need
Government guidelines suggest 1,000–1,200 milligrams (mg) of calcium per day is adequate, but RealAge recommends a bit more: 1,000–1,500 mg per day from food and calcium supplements -- but not all at once. Your body can absorb only 500–600 mg at a time, so divide it into two or three doses over the course of a day.
Tip: If you take calcium supplements, take them with vitamin D (they're often combined in one pill) to help absorption -- and with a little magnesium to reduce the constipation sometimes caused by calcium. Don't pair calcium with iron or fiber supplements, which can interfere with your body's ability to absorb the bone-building mineral.
Good Sources of Calcium
Yogurt, plain, low fat (8 ounces) 415 mg
Ricotta cheese from part-skim milk (1/2 cup) 335 mg
Soymilk, fortified (8 ounces) 300 mg
Spinach, cooked from frozen (1 cup) 290 mg
Milk, 2% milk fat (8 ounces) 285 mg
Swiss cheese, shredded (1/4 cup) 214 mg
Cheddar cheese, shredded (1/4 cup) 204 mg
Salmon, canned (3 ounces) 181 mg
Soybeans/edamame (1/2 cup) 130 mg
Tofu (3 ounces) 100 mg
Parmesan cheese, shredded (1 tablespoon) 55 mg
Eggs
Turn breakfast into a fat-burning morning boost by skipping the stack of pancakes and feasting on a couple of eggs instead. According to a study, huevos beat out carbs when it came to helping folks feel full longer and helping them beat back snack attacks later in the day. Here's how eggs helped folks lose 65% more body weight in a recent study.
A Breakfast Favorite That Blasts Fat?
By RealAge
What popular breakfast food may help you peel away pounds? Clue: You have to crack 'em.
Yep. Be they poached, scrambled, or sunny-side up, eggs may be a real friend to dieters. Here's why.
Eggs Beat Bagels
In a study, people on a low-calorie weight loss plan who ate two scrambled eggs and unbuttered toast (with jelly!) for breakfast lost 65 percent more weight than dieters who had a bagel with cream cheese for their morning meal. How do eggs help? They may simply keep people feeling satisfied longer than carbs do -- and eating less later on. (Worried about the cholesterol in eggs? Find out where things stand in the ongoing debate.)
Remember the Big Picture
Keep in mind that this study included a low-calorie diet. That means eating eggs for breakfast helps only if you're watching what and how much you eat the rest of the day, too.
Pistachios
Nuts may be high in fat, but it's the healthful unsaturated kind of fat found in pistachios. And like all nuts, pistachios offer lots of hunger-curbing protein and fiber. All of these qualities together explain why adding pistachios to the diet helped dieters in a study curb their appetites and lose more weight. Here's more on how pistachios and other nuts pull off this feeling-full feat.
Prev Next
Grapefruit
Of all the foods rumored to boost weight loss, grapefruit is likely the most famous. And research confirms that this fruit's get-slim celebrity status is for real. One study in particular revealed that eating half a grapefruit before each meal helped dieters shed more pounds than people who skipped the tart appetizer. Get hip to why most fad diets don't work and can actually be dangerous.
Prev Next
Don't Believe the Hype: Fad-Diet Fallacies
By RealAge
Page 1 of 1
No doubt you've heard at least one friend, family member, or coworker talk about his or her experiences with the Atkins approach, the South Beach Diet, or the Zone. But before counting carbs was all the rage, a low-fat lifestyle was the diet du jour. And before that . . . well, you get the picture.
The buzz surrounding these popular programs can make even the most sensible eater a little curious. And if you're searching for a way to lose stubborn pounds, these programs may seem like far more than a curiosity -- they may sound like the answer to your prayers.
Unfortunately, few people experience long-term success with fad diets, and a large percentage of the population is still overweight. How can that be? Simple: Rather than helping people understand and adopt a lifelong approach of balancing caloric intake with calories burned, fad diets often give people excuses to eat insensibly, hindering their attempts to make permanent, healthy changes to their diets and lifestyles.
How to Avoid Being Taken
Occasionally, there are a few valuable lessons hidden in some of these elaborate diet plans, but you need to sift through misinformation and oversimplification to get to the practical, healthful nutrition advice. So when it comes to fad diets, here are two quick ways to alleviate confusion:
1. Beware of misleading buzzwords. Once the buzz about the latest diet trend begins, marketers latch on to certain key words and product points that appeal to people who are watching their weight with the trend. Then, the food industry responds by focusing on words and claims that suggest their products can help dieters follow a particular diet plan. Unfortunately, these buzzwords are often misleading, allowing the manufacturers to capitalize not only on consumers' curiosity but also on their lack of certainty about nutrition labeling.
Take, for example, one of the buzz phrases in low-carb dieting: "net carbs." Dozens of products now claim to have low "net carbs" or low "impact carbs." Both of these terms sound technical. But the truth is that these terms were created by the diet and food industry.
They have not been evaluated, approved, or regulated by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA).
If it's not a government-approved labeling method, there's no way to evaluate what the term means or whether it's benefiting your health.
Furthermore, this "net carb" terminology does not generally provide an accurate estimate of total carbohydrate content. The FDA calculates total carbohydrates by subtracting grams of protein, fat, water, and ash from the total weight of the food. This number is listed on the food label as total carbohydrates.
Diet-food manufacturers calculate "net carbs" by taking total carbohydrates and subtracting fiber, glycerin, and sugar alcohols, all of which are forms of carbohydrates. This gives the appearance of reduced amounts of carbohydrates in their products and suggests that the products don't raise blood sugar, even though they do.
Unfortunately, the use of such labeling has expanded to hundreds of other foods and may lead you to believe you are consuming fewer carbs and calories than you actually are.
Avocado
This green goddess of heavenly, creamy taste can help you whittle your waist. It's true! Researchers suspect that the unsaturated fat in avocados may ratchet up body levels of the hunger-halting hormone called leptin -- a hormone that lets your brain know that you're full, so you stop eating. Find out what fats make you hungrier and what ones can help curb the munchies.
That fatty bacon cheeseburger may be loaded with calories, but at least it stomps out your hunger. Right?
Not necessarily. Compared to low-fat meals with the same number of calories, meals that are basically fat fiestas do an odd thing: The saturated fats in them make your body release less leptin, a hormone designed to turn off appetite. Saturated fats are the belly-bulgers and artery-agers found in fats that come from four-legged sources: high-fat red meats, butter, full-fat cheeses, and other whole-milk products. (Trans fats are just as bad, by the way.) Sat fats are rarely found in plant foods, with two vital exceptions: palm and coconut oils.
To help your body release leptin -- which is stored in fat cells (see? you knew they were good for something) -- you need to eat healthful unsaturated fats. Find them in nuts (especially walnuts), seeds, olives, avocados, most vegetable oils (especially canola), many fish, and even algae (or DHA omega-3 supplements made from algae). You don't want to avoid fat altogether: You need it to maintain your energy, absorb certain nutrients, and repair tissue. And moderate amounts of healthy fat are associated with a decreased risk of heart disease.
You also want to help leptin do its #1 job: telling you, "You're not hungry any more." So in addition to avoiding sat fat, adopt these waist protectors:
Mushrooms
If you want to try an easy and tasty calorie-cutting trick, then replace the meat in your favorite recipes with mushrooms. You'll automatically cut about 420 calories out of a meal, partly because you'll skip all the belly-padding saturated fat contained in meat. And folks in a recent study found mushrooms just as tasty and filling as meat.
Here's a simple way to slash major calories from some of your favorite comfort foods -- and you won't miss a thing.
When you're making lasagna, sloppy joes, chili, and other ground beef dishes, use chopped mushrooms instead of meat. If you're like the people in a recent study, you'll naturally eat about 420 fewer calories with these mushroom-enriched meals. (Need help losing holiday pounds? Try the Amazing Soup Diet in our New Year, New You Center.)
The Other Red Meat
People in the study also said the mushroom makeovers tasted just as good and kept them feeling full just as long as the beef versions did. And not only did the mushroom-based dishes mean a lower-calorie meal, but the mushroom eaters also ate fewer calories and less fat throughout the day than the beef eaters did. (Check out the Savory Mushroom Stroganoff recipe in this article.)
Olive Oil
This rich-tasting oil found in salad dressings and marinades contains a hunger-busting monounsaturated fat called oleic acid -- which triggers a complicated process in the gut that ultimately tells your brain you're full and makes you want to stop eating. Olive oil also plays a starring role in heart-healthy Mediterranean-style diets.
Prev Next
Whole Grains
Ready to trade your belly bulge for a flat tummy? Then toss your refined grains into the garbage, and eat more whole grains instead. Research shows this one move can help whittle your middle. We're talking brown rice, quinoa, steel-cut oats, whole-grain cereal, and 100% whole-wheat bread and pasta. Discover how whole grains helped flatten the bellies of 3,000 men and women in a recent study.
Prev Next
Ditching belly fat may be a simple matter of choosing the right rice or bread. And the choice to make? Whole grains.
You probably already love whole grains for their heart-healthy, disease-defying superpowers. So new research on their belly-fat-busting abilities should vault whole grains to the top of your grocery list.
A One-Grain Guy
In fact, the more whole grains you add to your diet in place of refined grains, the better off your waistline will be. In a new study where scientists reviewed the diets of close to 3,000 men and women, they found a strong correlation between belly fat and grain choice. The whole-grain lovers tended to have less belly fat than refined-grain buyers -- and had smaller waists, too. But eating more whole grains had a fat-curbing effect only when it was combined with a low intake of refined grains. So eating that whole-grain cereal at breakfast doesn't mean you can slack off and have the white-bread sandwich at lunchtime. (Here's another stomach-slimming secret: Cook with this type of fat.)
The Magic Number
Just how many whole-grain servings do you need to stay slim? Researchers think at least three servings daily is a good goal. That can be achieved with half a cup of steel-cut oatmeal in the morning and a couple of slices of whole-grain bread for your sandwich at lunch. But not just any whole-grain bread. Find a loaf that's high in fiber. Researchers suspect the waist-friendly qualities of whole-grain products come, in part, from the appetite-steadying fiber found inside. Whole grains also have lots of magnesium, which is good for improving insulin sensitivity.
Red Pepper
Add some heat to your meals and you'll boost not only the taste but also the effectiveness of your weight loss diet. A dash of cayenne pepper or some diced jalapeno or red peppers will do the trick. They all contain capsaicin -- the heat-inducing compound in red peppers that, according to research, tamps down appetite and curbs food intake later in the day. A similar compound in sweet peppers may hinder fat storage, too.
Fava Beans
Creamy and hearty, fava beans are a lean protein source bursting with flavonoids. And in a 14-year study, these special antioxidants were shown to help hinder the accumulation of extra belly fat. Slim your belly and your body with this fat-blasting plan from the YOU Docs.
Rice with Veggies
Adding some high-fiber vegetables like broccoli, carrots, and kale to your rice will obviously help lower the calorie count. But not only that. Adding veggies to rice at lunchtime appears to slow stomach emptying, according to research. The end result? You feel full longer. In fact, people in a study ate much less at dinner when they added veggies to their rice at lunch. Here's more on how rice and vegetables work together to keep you full.
Shrink your appetite, your calorie intake, and your pants size with just one little addition to your rice: vegetables.
In a recent study of normal-weight people, mixing vegetables into a plain rice dish at lunch helped people feel fuller for the rest of the day. So much so that they ate way fewer calories at dinner than the folks who had their rice straight up.
Less Is More
Mixing veggies with the rice also lowered the calorie density of the lunch dish, shaving off a solid 100+ calories from the meal. So whether you opt for brown, basmati, or long-grain, adding things like broccoli, carrots, peppers, and onions to your rice can help cut calories from your day twice. And that's twice as nice for your waist! (Here's another way to cut your appetite. Eat a little of this kind of fat.)
Weight Loss Weapon
It's not entirely clear why the lower-calorie veggies-and-rice dish produced a better effect on all-day hunger compared with the rice-only dish, but researchers suspect the high water content of produce may have been part of the key. High water content makes vegetables bulky, creating the visual illusion that the rice-plus-veggie serving was extra generous and hearty, and therefore more filling. Plus, eating high-fiber veggies helps slow stomach emptying. Whatever the hunger-quelling mechanism, it's simple to toss a few of your favorite vegetables into not only rice but just about any meal.
How come it not be irritating....while I was so in very short-breath, like almost end-of-life and needing CPR, there’s an uncle, at the age of almost 60 years old, jog passed through me. Then, there’s an aunty, like in late 40s, also passing through me, happily, breathing easily. Gosh.....I am so ashamed of myself. What happened to my fitness level.....hello......fitness? Hello........
I hate to admit it but I just could not deny it, I am not fit and overweight.
How could I let this happen? How could I be so cruel to my own body? Since I like to dress up, how could I do nothing about it and just accepted it as it is?
Number 1 fact
This is the heaviest weight in my life. I’ve never been to this weight even when I’m pregnant.
Number 2 fact
Eating, to me is an entertainment. I felt so delightful and overwhelming only by talking about food and when eating.... I really could do the eating, loosing myself in the food. The feeling is so great. It’s like the saying, diamond is a girl best friend. But for my case, food is my best friend and eating is one of my happiness. Even when I already fall asleep and then you wake me up in the middle of the night, telling me, hey let’s eat burger, I will just wake up and eat the burger, delightfully. In other words, it is very difficult for me to refuse eating and to reject an eating invitation. It’s a temptation that I can’t resist....and without food I’ll be depressed and feeling like my life is a misery and is over.
Hence, having this sort of thinking, dieting is never the word that appeared in my life. I may say it out loud that I want to go on diet, but I was never serious about it.
However, now, I am also certain of a few things.
1) I don’t want my weight to continue increasing. And I don’t want my BMI to be at the overweight column.
2) I want to be fit and I want to be able to jog happily for at least half kilometer.
3) I want to easily shop for clothing.
4) I want to see me in fit body which means without the spare tyre and visible excessive fat that certainly won’t make you pretty in your very own eyes.
Thus, I need commitment plus with high consistency and persistence to start a new daily menu. Since I am so passionate about eating, skipping meals will certainly not work for me. So, I shall first try to control my food consumption and to be selective in food choices. This is called smart eating :) Therefore, initially, I shall try this out. I need to divert my love for food to make me healthy instead of making me obesity. Love is good but still overdosed in love is toxic.
Frens.....fightin!!
Below are the list of 11 choices of food that is good for your diet that I extracted from Yahoo. Thanks Yahoo ;)
Yogurt
Mmmm. This creamy, tangy snack is loaded with calcium -- and studies show that calcium may curtail weight gain by hindering the absorption of fat in the small intestine. Check out these other good eats that are bursting with calcium.
Good Sources of Calcium
How much calcium you need, and why, plus calcium-rich foods
Benefits of Calcium
Calcium is essential for strong bones and teeth, and it helps prevent arthritis. But that's not all this mineral is good for. Calcium helps your brain communicate with your nerves and regulates blood pressure, and it may reduce the symptoms of PMS and the risk of colon cancer.
Recommended Amount: How Much You Need
Government guidelines suggest 1,000–1,200 milligrams (mg) of calcium per day is adequate, but RealAge recommends a bit more: 1,000–1,500 mg per day from food and calcium supplements -- but not all at once. Your body can absorb only 500–600 mg at a time, so divide it into two or three doses over the course of a day.
Tip: If you take calcium supplements, take them with vitamin D (they're often combined in one pill) to help absorption -- and with a little magnesium to reduce the constipation sometimes caused by calcium. Don't pair calcium with iron or fiber supplements, which can interfere with your body's ability to absorb the bone-building mineral.
Good Sources of Calcium
Yogurt, plain, low fat (8 ounces) 415 mg
Ricotta cheese from part-skim milk (1/2 cup) 335 mg
Soymilk, fortified (8 ounces) 300 mg
Spinach, cooked from frozen (1 cup) 290 mg
Milk, 2% milk fat (8 ounces) 285 mg
Swiss cheese, shredded (1/4 cup) 214 mg
Cheddar cheese, shredded (1/4 cup) 204 mg
Salmon, canned (3 ounces) 181 mg
Soybeans/edamame (1/2 cup) 130 mg
Tofu (3 ounces) 100 mg
Parmesan cheese, shredded (1 tablespoon) 55 mg
Eggs
Turn breakfast into a fat-burning morning boost by skipping the stack of pancakes and feasting on a couple of eggs instead. According to a study, huevos beat out carbs when it came to helping folks feel full longer and helping them beat back snack attacks later in the day. Here's how eggs helped folks lose 65% more body weight in a recent study.
A Breakfast Favorite That Blasts Fat?
By RealAge
What popular breakfast food may help you peel away pounds? Clue: You have to crack 'em.
Yep. Be they poached, scrambled, or sunny-side up, eggs may be a real friend to dieters. Here's why.
Eggs Beat Bagels
In a study, people on a low-calorie weight loss plan who ate two scrambled eggs and unbuttered toast (with jelly!) for breakfast lost 65 percent more weight than dieters who had a bagel with cream cheese for their morning meal. How do eggs help? They may simply keep people feeling satisfied longer than carbs do -- and eating less later on. (Worried about the cholesterol in eggs? Find out where things stand in the ongoing debate.)
Remember the Big Picture
Keep in mind that this study included a low-calorie diet. That means eating eggs for breakfast helps only if you're watching what and how much you eat the rest of the day, too.
Pistachios
Nuts may be high in fat, but it's the healthful unsaturated kind of fat found in pistachios. And like all nuts, pistachios offer lots of hunger-curbing protein and fiber. All of these qualities together explain why adding pistachios to the diet helped dieters in a study curb their appetites and lose more weight. Here's more on how pistachios and other nuts pull off this feeling-full feat.
Prev Next
Grapefruit
Of all the foods rumored to boost weight loss, grapefruit is likely the most famous. And research confirms that this fruit's get-slim celebrity status is for real. One study in particular revealed that eating half a grapefruit before each meal helped dieters shed more pounds than people who skipped the tart appetizer. Get hip to why most fad diets don't work and can actually be dangerous.
Prev Next
Don't Believe the Hype: Fad-Diet Fallacies
By RealAge
Page 1 of 1
No doubt you've heard at least one friend, family member, or coworker talk about his or her experiences with the Atkins approach, the South Beach Diet, or the Zone. But before counting carbs was all the rage, a low-fat lifestyle was the diet du jour. And before that . . . well, you get the picture.
The buzz surrounding these popular programs can make even the most sensible eater a little curious. And if you're searching for a way to lose stubborn pounds, these programs may seem like far more than a curiosity -- they may sound like the answer to your prayers.
Unfortunately, few people experience long-term success with fad diets, and a large percentage of the population is still overweight. How can that be? Simple: Rather than helping people understand and adopt a lifelong approach of balancing caloric intake with calories burned, fad diets often give people excuses to eat insensibly, hindering their attempts to make permanent, healthy changes to their diets and lifestyles.
How to Avoid Being Taken
Occasionally, there are a few valuable lessons hidden in some of these elaborate diet plans, but you need to sift through misinformation and oversimplification to get to the practical, healthful nutrition advice. So when it comes to fad diets, here are two quick ways to alleviate confusion:
1. Beware of misleading buzzwords. Once the buzz about the latest diet trend begins, marketers latch on to certain key words and product points that appeal to people who are watching their weight with the trend. Then, the food industry responds by focusing on words and claims that suggest their products can help dieters follow a particular diet plan. Unfortunately, these buzzwords are often misleading, allowing the manufacturers to capitalize not only on consumers' curiosity but also on their lack of certainty about nutrition labeling.
Take, for example, one of the buzz phrases in low-carb dieting: "net carbs." Dozens of products now claim to have low "net carbs" or low "impact carbs." Both of these terms sound technical. But the truth is that these terms were created by the diet and food industry.
They have not been evaluated, approved, or regulated by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA).
If it's not a government-approved labeling method, there's no way to evaluate what the term means or whether it's benefiting your health.
Furthermore, this "net carb" terminology does not generally provide an accurate estimate of total carbohydrate content. The FDA calculates total carbohydrates by subtracting grams of protein, fat, water, and ash from the total weight of the food. This number is listed on the food label as total carbohydrates.
Diet-food manufacturers calculate "net carbs" by taking total carbohydrates and subtracting fiber, glycerin, and sugar alcohols, all of which are forms of carbohydrates. This gives the appearance of reduced amounts of carbohydrates in their products and suggests that the products don't raise blood sugar, even though they do.
Unfortunately, the use of such labeling has expanded to hundreds of other foods and may lead you to believe you are consuming fewer carbs and calories than you actually are.
Avocado
This green goddess of heavenly, creamy taste can help you whittle your waist. It's true! Researchers suspect that the unsaturated fat in avocados may ratchet up body levels of the hunger-halting hormone called leptin -- a hormone that lets your brain know that you're full, so you stop eating. Find out what fats make you hungrier and what ones can help curb the munchies.
That fatty bacon cheeseburger may be loaded with calories, but at least it stomps out your hunger. Right?
Not necessarily. Compared to low-fat meals with the same number of calories, meals that are basically fat fiestas do an odd thing: The saturated fats in them make your body release less leptin, a hormone designed to turn off appetite. Saturated fats are the belly-bulgers and artery-agers found in fats that come from four-legged sources: high-fat red meats, butter, full-fat cheeses, and other whole-milk products. (Trans fats are just as bad, by the way.) Sat fats are rarely found in plant foods, with two vital exceptions: palm and coconut oils.
To help your body release leptin -- which is stored in fat cells (see? you knew they were good for something) -- you need to eat healthful unsaturated fats. Find them in nuts (especially walnuts), seeds, olives, avocados, most vegetable oils (especially canola), many fish, and even algae (or DHA omega-3 supplements made from algae). You don't want to avoid fat altogether: You need it to maintain your energy, absorb certain nutrients, and repair tissue. And moderate amounts of healthy fat are associated with a decreased risk of heart disease.
You also want to help leptin do its #1 job: telling you, "You're not hungry any more." So in addition to avoiding sat fat, adopt these waist protectors:
Mushrooms
If you want to try an easy and tasty calorie-cutting trick, then replace the meat in your favorite recipes with mushrooms. You'll automatically cut about 420 calories out of a meal, partly because you'll skip all the belly-padding saturated fat contained in meat. And folks in a recent study found mushrooms just as tasty and filling as meat.
Here's a simple way to slash major calories from some of your favorite comfort foods -- and you won't miss a thing.
When you're making lasagna, sloppy joes, chili, and other ground beef dishes, use chopped mushrooms instead of meat. If you're like the people in a recent study, you'll naturally eat about 420 fewer calories with these mushroom-enriched meals. (Need help losing holiday pounds? Try the Amazing Soup Diet in our New Year, New You Center.)
The Other Red Meat
People in the study also said the mushroom makeovers tasted just as good and kept them feeling full just as long as the beef versions did. And not only did the mushroom-based dishes mean a lower-calorie meal, but the mushroom eaters also ate fewer calories and less fat throughout the day than the beef eaters did. (Check out the Savory Mushroom Stroganoff recipe in this article.)
Olive Oil
This rich-tasting oil found in salad dressings and marinades contains a hunger-busting monounsaturated fat called oleic acid -- which triggers a complicated process in the gut that ultimately tells your brain you're full and makes you want to stop eating. Olive oil also plays a starring role in heart-healthy Mediterranean-style diets.
Prev Next
Whole Grains
Ready to trade your belly bulge for a flat tummy? Then toss your refined grains into the garbage, and eat more whole grains instead. Research shows this one move can help whittle your middle. We're talking brown rice, quinoa, steel-cut oats, whole-grain cereal, and 100% whole-wheat bread and pasta. Discover how whole grains helped flatten the bellies of 3,000 men and women in a recent study.
Prev Next
Ditching belly fat may be a simple matter of choosing the right rice or bread. And the choice to make? Whole grains.
You probably already love whole grains for their heart-healthy, disease-defying superpowers. So new research on their belly-fat-busting abilities should vault whole grains to the top of your grocery list.
A One-Grain Guy
In fact, the more whole grains you add to your diet in place of refined grains, the better off your waistline will be. In a new study where scientists reviewed the diets of close to 3,000 men and women, they found a strong correlation between belly fat and grain choice. The whole-grain lovers tended to have less belly fat than refined-grain buyers -- and had smaller waists, too. But eating more whole grains had a fat-curbing effect only when it was combined with a low intake of refined grains. So eating that whole-grain cereal at breakfast doesn't mean you can slack off and have the white-bread sandwich at lunchtime. (Here's another stomach-slimming secret: Cook with this type of fat.)
The Magic Number
Just how many whole-grain servings do you need to stay slim? Researchers think at least three servings daily is a good goal. That can be achieved with half a cup of steel-cut oatmeal in the morning and a couple of slices of whole-grain bread for your sandwich at lunch. But not just any whole-grain bread. Find a loaf that's high in fiber. Researchers suspect the waist-friendly qualities of whole-grain products come, in part, from the appetite-steadying fiber found inside. Whole grains also have lots of magnesium, which is good for improving insulin sensitivity.
Red Pepper
Add some heat to your meals and you'll boost not only the taste but also the effectiveness of your weight loss diet. A dash of cayenne pepper or some diced jalapeno or red peppers will do the trick. They all contain capsaicin -- the heat-inducing compound in red peppers that, according to research, tamps down appetite and curbs food intake later in the day. A similar compound in sweet peppers may hinder fat storage, too.
Fava Beans
Creamy and hearty, fava beans are a lean protein source bursting with flavonoids. And in a 14-year study, these special antioxidants were shown to help hinder the accumulation of extra belly fat. Slim your belly and your body with this fat-blasting plan from the YOU Docs.
Rice with Veggies
Adding some high-fiber vegetables like broccoli, carrots, and kale to your rice will obviously help lower the calorie count. But not only that. Adding veggies to rice at lunchtime appears to slow stomach emptying, according to research. The end result? You feel full longer. In fact, people in a study ate much less at dinner when they added veggies to their rice at lunch. Here's more on how rice and vegetables work together to keep you full.
Shrink your appetite, your calorie intake, and your pants size with just one little addition to your rice: vegetables.
In a recent study of normal-weight people, mixing vegetables into a plain rice dish at lunch helped people feel fuller for the rest of the day. So much so that they ate way fewer calories at dinner than the folks who had their rice straight up.
Less Is More
Mixing veggies with the rice also lowered the calorie density of the lunch dish, shaving off a solid 100+ calories from the meal. So whether you opt for brown, basmati, or long-grain, adding things like broccoli, carrots, peppers, and onions to your rice can help cut calories from your day twice. And that's twice as nice for your waist! (Here's another way to cut your appetite. Eat a little of this kind of fat.)
Weight Loss Weapon
It's not entirely clear why the lower-calorie veggies-and-rice dish produced a better effect on all-day hunger compared with the rice-only dish, but researchers suspect the high water content of produce may have been part of the key. High water content makes vegetables bulky, creating the visual illusion that the rice-plus-veggie serving was extra generous and hearty, and therefore more filling. Plus, eating high-fiber veggies helps slow stomach emptying. Whatever the hunger-quelling mechanism, it's simple to toss a few of your favorite vegetables into not only rice but just about any meal.
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
I believe I can fly......
I’ve aim to be excellent in anything that I do. Excellent and no compromise – the highest, the best. Of course, when you’ve aimed, go to the maximum, the very maximum. So, do I. I am convinced and determined that the goal, the aim to be on the excellence path was achievable, not mission impossible. My motivation level was full, like the new- and- just-pumped-with-air-balloon. Full of spirit and energy, like the atoms at the most outside layer of the molecules, couldn’t wait any longer to flew, dancing, jumping, mingling with other molecules. The excitement was exploding, enormous, extravaganza. It’s like, I’m a dancer and I couldn’t keep my feet to stand still as it can’t wait to get on the dance floor.
But then.......it struck me right in the face, what should I dance?
Shall I tango?
Shall I tip toe?
Shall I ballet?
Shall I salsa?
OMG! I have lost the gist. It’s like I have a sweet dream, but I don’t fall asleep. I have an alluring slice of pecan butterscotch, but I don’t have appetite. I have a red Ferrari 458 Italia, but I don’t drive......
How pathetic.....I have everything except for the thing that I want-enjoy-love-to-do.......I want to be good, but I don’t know, in what, that I want to be good. I’m not sure whether this thought of mine is kind of confusing or amusing.
Hmmmm.......am I complicated or complication is part of me?
Since I am clueless, I’ve review the chronology....
In school, I was selected to attend to science classes, science stream because of the earlier examination results, so I followed and I was okay.
After school, I got engineering and science course offered, I took science. The decision was much influenced by my parents that really want me to go the university that offered the science course, chemistry to be precise. So, I obeyed and I was doing pretty well. I guessed, it was very much driven by the condition of my family. I grew up in the environment that make ones, think that life will be like hell without money. You have this-kind-of-thought that you shall have no friends, no one unless you have money. You need to earn money as much as you need to earn respect.
Therefore, with all these thoughts in mind, I need to get good grades, hence, obtain good job, earn good money and live life the way I want it to be. Thus..... I’ve been there. I’ve got what I’ve aimed for. Only little that I know, that, as a result, I have become a slave instead of a master to myself.
Am I working for money or the money working for me? It is satisfying, fulfilling to earn money and to lose everything else?
Can I get both, money and satisfaction? Can I amused the physical needs and the soul needs simultaneously?
I have a dream that I am spending my life doing the thing that I love most and at the same time, earn money, earn respect, fulfilling my responsibility as a muslim, as a citizen. Or even sweet and pleasurable, to be able to do the thing that I love most and money is not a factor. Meaning, I have a funder for the activities or I am a millionaire that earn passive income and hence my active life can be channel to the thing that I love most.
Hah....may my dreams came true........And I may continue searching, looking for the thing that I love most, to do, to enjoy, to love and to contribute most..... By the time my super fast jet ready, I shall knew the destination to fly :)
I Believe I Can Fly - R Kelly
I used to think that I could not go on
And life was nothing but an awful song
But now I know the meaning of true love
I'm leaning on the everlasting arms
If I can see it, then I can do it
If I just believe it, there's nothing to it
[Chorus:]
I believe I can fly
I believe I can touch the sky
I think about it every night and day
Spread my wings and fly away
I believe I can soar
I see me running through that open door
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly
See I was on the verge of breaking down
Sometimes silence can seem so loud
There are miracles in life I must achieve
But first I know it starts inside of me, oh
If I can see it, then I can be it
If I just believe it, there's nothing to it
AYu
But then.......it struck me right in the face, what should I dance?
Shall I tango?
Shall I tip toe?
Shall I ballet?
Shall I salsa?
OMG! I have lost the gist. It’s like I have a sweet dream, but I don’t fall asleep. I have an alluring slice of pecan butterscotch, but I don’t have appetite. I have a red Ferrari 458 Italia, but I don’t drive......
How pathetic.....I have everything except for the thing that I want-enjoy-love-to-do.......I want to be good, but I don’t know, in what, that I want to be good. I’m not sure whether this thought of mine is kind of confusing or amusing.
Hmmmm.......am I complicated or complication is part of me?
Since I am clueless, I’ve review the chronology....
In school, I was selected to attend to science classes, science stream because of the earlier examination results, so I followed and I was okay.
After school, I got engineering and science course offered, I took science. The decision was much influenced by my parents that really want me to go the university that offered the science course, chemistry to be precise. So, I obeyed and I was doing pretty well. I guessed, it was very much driven by the condition of my family. I grew up in the environment that make ones, think that life will be like hell without money. You have this-kind-of-thought that you shall have no friends, no one unless you have money. You need to earn money as much as you need to earn respect.
Therefore, with all these thoughts in mind, I need to get good grades, hence, obtain good job, earn good money and live life the way I want it to be. Thus..... I’ve been there. I’ve got what I’ve aimed for. Only little that I know, that, as a result, I have become a slave instead of a master to myself.
Am I working for money or the money working for me? It is satisfying, fulfilling to earn money and to lose everything else?
Can I get both, money and satisfaction? Can I amused the physical needs and the soul needs simultaneously?
I have a dream that I am spending my life doing the thing that I love most and at the same time, earn money, earn respect, fulfilling my responsibility as a muslim, as a citizen. Or even sweet and pleasurable, to be able to do the thing that I love most and money is not a factor. Meaning, I have a funder for the activities or I am a millionaire that earn passive income and hence my active life can be channel to the thing that I love most.
Hah....may my dreams came true........And I may continue searching, looking for the thing that I love most, to do, to enjoy, to love and to contribute most..... By the time my super fast jet ready, I shall knew the destination to fly :)
I Believe I Can Fly - R Kelly
I used to think that I could not go on
And life was nothing but an awful song
But now I know the meaning of true love
I'm leaning on the everlasting arms
If I can see it, then I can do it
If I just believe it, there's nothing to it
[Chorus:]
I believe I can fly
I believe I can touch the sky
I think about it every night and day
Spread my wings and fly away
I believe I can soar
I see me running through that open door
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly
See I was on the verge of breaking down
Sometimes silence can seem so loud
There are miracles in life I must achieve
But first I know it starts inside of me, oh
If I can see it, then I can be it
If I just believe it, there's nothing to it
AYu
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Muhammad Afiq Md Ashraf
Often, very often in this blog, I wrote about my daughter, Nurul Adibah. Very seldom or may be none, I write something on Muhammad Afiq, my beloved son. I have read an article that says something like this “to those parents who had a special child, don’t neglect your normal child because very often all the parents’ attentions goes to the special child...”
It’s very true. Sometimes you were just too busy taking care of the special one and forgot that...oh mine....there’s another one, peeping at the door, wanting to say something and having the impression like….hey mama, I’m your child too…..Afiq sacrificed a lot too…especially for the first 2 years after Adibah was born, because Adibah is always sick and have to be admitted to the hospital. And whenever she’s in, I’m staying too, of course….sometimes for almost 2 weeks. And Afiq kept calling and asked the same question, when will we be back...I think he already get used to it…I hope he does. I hope he understood the whole situation, even though he is just a kid.....
Afiq, my beloved son, is kind of a slow, sentimental person. When he was younger, me and my husband were so worried on whether his brain was kind of slow too…. He is just a kid, but it seems like his taking some time to think first before he does something. Kids don’t think much especially boys. Their level of maturity development is slower than girls. They just do whatever they like. But Afiq is totally different.
There are times when he refused to play outside. I was thinking that may be this circumstance appeared because he wanted to get deep into the play station. But I was wrong. He then explained that he dislike the way of our neighbors treated the children. I was aware of this situation, these kind-of-neighbors but was unaware that it affected Afiq’s action. There’s an uncle that often yelled to the kids, yelling the negative words...I do not wish to explain further....He is old and should be a good behavior model, or at least just be nice and saying positive, good things, but unfortunately, he is not...And there’s one aunty that are too defensive of her grandchild. She like forcing the neighborhood kids to play with his grandchildren, or else, she will scold them. She did not try to understand of why the kids did not want to play with her grandchild...and hence, Afiq made a decision to not play outside.
And when Afiq is about 5 years, he complained that there’s a kid that always like to punch him. So, I was saying, then why don’t you punched him back (I was not sure on whether I was giving a correct advise but to me this is called self defense :)). And Afiq replied back, are you angry if someone hit me? Then I said, yes of course. Then, he said, so if he punch the boy and the boy’s parent saw it, they will be angry too isn’t? Hmmmm.... have to think first before saying anything.....then, I said “ you should told the boy’s parents that he punched you first"...
Simultaneously, I was thinking, is my child normal? Doesn’t seems like he is thinking too much before taking any action which is not so normal for a kid at 5 years old? I then draw a conclusion that my son is under the sentimental category and very attentive to his environment....hmmmmm
Other than that, like other kids, Afiq also did ask a lot of questions like how to produce babies? How do we get electricity? What is rape? Why the colours of human are different? He is referring to so-white-skin-people and so-black skin-people. Why there are many religions? And so many related and interrelated questions...
And because he is such a “hardworking” student, he also often asked on why he has to go to school and why schooling is 5 days and not-schooling is 2 days? You see....having kids are not that simple. It’s complicated actually...
The book on parenthood that I’ve read are right, when you explained to your child, explain to him the right, correct answer... the truth... Although they are just kids, do not underestimate them because they can understand it in their own way. Hence, when I explained to Afiq on Adibah’s condition, just one time of explanation, he can understood it and accepted it with no further question ask.
Looking at him, cuddling Adibah and kissing her and saying that she is so cute often light up my day. He loves her as much as we do…..
Recently, Afiq always asked on whether he is going to get another younger brother or sister. Then I replied, what if abah get marry with another woman and then have kids. So, automatically, Afiq will have younger brother and sister. Afiq then replied, but if this occurred, won’t you be sad? “Afiq tak nak mama sedih…”
Syukur Alhamdullilah.....I have a hero ;)
It’s very true. Sometimes you were just too busy taking care of the special one and forgot that...oh mine....there’s another one, peeping at the door, wanting to say something and having the impression like….hey mama, I’m your child too…..Afiq sacrificed a lot too…especially for the first 2 years after Adibah was born, because Adibah is always sick and have to be admitted to the hospital. And whenever she’s in, I’m staying too, of course….sometimes for almost 2 weeks. And Afiq kept calling and asked the same question, when will we be back...I think he already get used to it…I hope he does. I hope he understood the whole situation, even though he is just a kid.....
Afiq, my beloved son, is kind of a slow, sentimental person. When he was younger, me and my husband were so worried on whether his brain was kind of slow too…. He is just a kid, but it seems like his taking some time to think first before he does something. Kids don’t think much especially boys. Their level of maturity development is slower than girls. They just do whatever they like. But Afiq is totally different.
There are times when he refused to play outside. I was thinking that may be this circumstance appeared because he wanted to get deep into the play station. But I was wrong. He then explained that he dislike the way of our neighbors treated the children. I was aware of this situation, these kind-of-neighbors but was unaware that it affected Afiq’s action. There’s an uncle that often yelled to the kids, yelling the negative words...I do not wish to explain further....He is old and should be a good behavior model, or at least just be nice and saying positive, good things, but unfortunately, he is not...And there’s one aunty that are too defensive of her grandchild. She like forcing the neighborhood kids to play with his grandchildren, or else, she will scold them. She did not try to understand of why the kids did not want to play with her grandchild...and hence, Afiq made a decision to not play outside.
And when Afiq is about 5 years, he complained that there’s a kid that always like to punch him. So, I was saying, then why don’t you punched him back (I was not sure on whether I was giving a correct advise but to me this is called self defense :)). And Afiq replied back, are you angry if someone hit me? Then I said, yes of course. Then, he said, so if he punch the boy and the boy’s parent saw it, they will be angry too isn’t? Hmmmm.... have to think first before saying anything.....then, I said “ you should told the boy’s parents that he punched you first"...
Simultaneously, I was thinking, is my child normal? Doesn’t seems like he is thinking too much before taking any action which is not so normal for a kid at 5 years old? I then draw a conclusion that my son is under the sentimental category and very attentive to his environment....hmmmmm
Other than that, like other kids, Afiq also did ask a lot of questions like how to produce babies? How do we get electricity? What is rape? Why the colours of human are different? He is referring to so-white-skin-people and so-black skin-people. Why there are many religions? And so many related and interrelated questions...
And because he is such a “hardworking” student, he also often asked on why he has to go to school and why schooling is 5 days and not-schooling is 2 days? You see....having kids are not that simple. It’s complicated actually...
The book on parenthood that I’ve read are right, when you explained to your child, explain to him the right, correct answer... the truth... Although they are just kids, do not underestimate them because they can understand it in their own way. Hence, when I explained to Afiq on Adibah’s condition, just one time of explanation, he can understood it and accepted it with no further question ask.
Looking at him, cuddling Adibah and kissing her and saying that she is so cute often light up my day. He loves her as much as we do…..
Recently, Afiq always asked on whether he is going to get another younger brother or sister. Then I replied, what if abah get marry with another woman and then have kids. So, automatically, Afiq will have younger brother and sister. Afiq then replied, but if this occurred, won’t you be sad? “Afiq tak nak mama sedih…”
Syukur Alhamdullilah.....I have a hero ;)
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Nice guy finish last
A few years back, when I was in Japan for training, I met this one guy, one very shy quiet guy. I went there for training. We used to communicate through email before my visit to Japan. Because we are in the same department, when I was in Japan, he kind of having the obligation to entertain me.....so I have to follow him here and there in the company. For the fact, he is tall, in term of look = not so good looking, kind of a nerd, polite although not much words coming out from his mouth (since he did not talk much, this polite adjective is based on the way he treated you, in a very good-manner with respect), single and he has a nice car :) of course, Japan’s car is very nice....
One day, I have to go through an equipment training with him. Oh my god, it was so boring. Although he had tried his best to make sure I did not fall asleep....and I was yawning at the rate of twice per minute. I was doing that deliberately so that he stopped talking and the session ended quickly. However this body language, did not work, because he still continue to talk.....( I guessed he never use body language before.....)
I then looked at his face...I was stunned and amazed because I just realised that he, actually can talk. Since I met him, he only talked to me about 10 sentences a day. I thought that this was because of the language barrier. My interpretation is wrong.....
The way he talked about the machine illustrating his deep passion and enthusiasm towards that equipment as if he had slept with it. Asked him anything about that machine, he can explain to you from A to Z, inside and outside. He is so technically sound. As for me, only by mentioning the word equipment and technical, can frightened me. I then at that very specific moment discovered that I am certainly not in love with machines and all the related technical things on machines. I can understand it, but to love it, to sleep with it, talking to it.... that is just not me.
For example, a person like me, given a machine called car. I only know how to run this application so that it can move me from this dot to that dot. And the basic function on how to make it move, like refuelling. Other than that, I don’t know and I just don’t want to know ( I often get scolded by my sister for this......).
Okay, come back to that Japanese guy. Usually after work, we will go for dinner. After dinner, this guy will have the task to send me home. Thus, this is the moment when I was alone with him. Since he did not talk much, other that talking about machine, I was doing all the talking and questioning and he only answered. I asked him about his life, what he does after work and bla...bla..bla.....Trust me, you would never want to hear of his routine, it is so black and white until I wonder whether he is a man or machine....I seriously, honestly think, he should get more colours, he should get married.
Earlier that week, when we went and played bowling, I observed that there are many girls. So, there is no reason of not getting a girl because there are many. And this Japanese guy, don’t really talked to girls.....So, girls don’t talk to him too. As a result, there is not much conversation with the opposite sex. In addition to this, this Japanese guy, even after drinking wine can still control himself. He doesn’t go after girls even after he is drunk. Could he be not normal? That is out of question. The main point is that, he is in a very good controlled of himself, may be too good until he can’t seem to let loose of himself, he is very shy and may be with a little bit of low self esteem when it comes to girls. If he can master the girls like he master the equipment, he would certainly become a Casanova despite of his look. Girls don’t really go for looks only, this is a fact.
What I would like to express here is.......
Guys can’t be too shy. Guys should be the one to approach girls. Guys should be brave, strong, with high courage and of course fight for their love.
If a guy is interested with a girl, then he should start giving signals. Once the girl, giving a positive feedback, the guy should not wait any longer but straight away making an attempt to tackle the girl. I understood that when it comes to girls, guys used to have a skyrocket ego......But come on..... You can’t have babies with your ego. So, think wisely......
Giving a try to tackle a girl won’t make you a simpleton. Even if you are rejected, that simply means you are not reading the signals correctly or the girls did not give the correct signals....So what? It is not the end the world. Take it as a lesson and try again. That’s what we do, practice makes perfect. And come on, you are a guy, meaning, you can’t be too delicate and vulnerable. It does not fit the image of a normal-healthy-man.
Unfortunately, plus with a self-denial statement, a guy would say, I don’t need a woman. No woman, no cry......well, I don’t think I need to further elaborate this. We are designed by the Creator to have the tendency to fulfil our needs as human. So, why choose to go against the principle?? You’ll never win.....
Therefore, hurry up..... It is always not too late to learn and try.....come on guys, let’s get the ball rolling :)
AYu
One day, I have to go through an equipment training with him. Oh my god, it was so boring. Although he had tried his best to make sure I did not fall asleep....and I was yawning at the rate of twice per minute. I was doing that deliberately so that he stopped talking and the session ended quickly. However this body language, did not work, because he still continue to talk.....( I guessed he never use body language before.....)
I then looked at his face...I was stunned and amazed because I just realised that he, actually can talk. Since I met him, he only talked to me about 10 sentences a day. I thought that this was because of the language barrier. My interpretation is wrong.....
The way he talked about the machine illustrating his deep passion and enthusiasm towards that equipment as if he had slept with it. Asked him anything about that machine, he can explain to you from A to Z, inside and outside. He is so technically sound. As for me, only by mentioning the word equipment and technical, can frightened me. I then at that very specific moment discovered that I am certainly not in love with machines and all the related technical things on machines. I can understand it, but to love it, to sleep with it, talking to it.... that is just not me.
For example, a person like me, given a machine called car. I only know how to run this application so that it can move me from this dot to that dot. And the basic function on how to make it move, like refuelling. Other than that, I don’t know and I just don’t want to know ( I often get scolded by my sister for this......).
Okay, come back to that Japanese guy. Usually after work, we will go for dinner. After dinner, this guy will have the task to send me home. Thus, this is the moment when I was alone with him. Since he did not talk much, other that talking about machine, I was doing all the talking and questioning and he only answered. I asked him about his life, what he does after work and bla...bla..bla.....Trust me, you would never want to hear of his routine, it is so black and white until I wonder whether he is a man or machine....I seriously, honestly think, he should get more colours, he should get married.
Earlier that week, when we went and played bowling, I observed that there are many girls. So, there is no reason of not getting a girl because there are many. And this Japanese guy, don’t really talked to girls.....So, girls don’t talk to him too. As a result, there is not much conversation with the opposite sex. In addition to this, this Japanese guy, even after drinking wine can still control himself. He doesn’t go after girls even after he is drunk. Could he be not normal? That is out of question. The main point is that, he is in a very good controlled of himself, may be too good until he can’t seem to let loose of himself, he is very shy and may be with a little bit of low self esteem when it comes to girls. If he can master the girls like he master the equipment, he would certainly become a Casanova despite of his look. Girls don’t really go for looks only, this is a fact.
What I would like to express here is.......
Guys can’t be too shy. Guys should be the one to approach girls. Guys should be brave, strong, with high courage and of course fight for their love.
If a guy is interested with a girl, then he should start giving signals. Once the girl, giving a positive feedback, the guy should not wait any longer but straight away making an attempt to tackle the girl. I understood that when it comes to girls, guys used to have a skyrocket ego......But come on..... You can’t have babies with your ego. So, think wisely......
Giving a try to tackle a girl won’t make you a simpleton. Even if you are rejected, that simply means you are not reading the signals correctly or the girls did not give the correct signals....So what? It is not the end the world. Take it as a lesson and try again. That’s what we do, practice makes perfect. And come on, you are a guy, meaning, you can’t be too delicate and vulnerable. It does not fit the image of a normal-healthy-man.
Unfortunately, plus with a self-denial statement, a guy would say, I don’t need a woman. No woman, no cry......well, I don’t think I need to further elaborate this. We are designed by the Creator to have the tendency to fulfil our needs as human. So, why choose to go against the principle?? You’ll never win.....
Therefore, hurry up..... It is always not too late to learn and try.....come on guys, let’s get the ball rolling :)
AYu
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
For my lil sis......Happy Birthday!!
Dear lil sis,
First and foremost, Happy Birthday! If you asked me for my wish for you, I wished for all your wishes and dreams came true, millions and countless of happiness for you to share with your loved ones, all your sadness been washed away by the falling rain and of course, all your disappointments and despair gone, in a blink of eye.
On your birthday, it often reminds me of the years that had gone by, the moments that we shared, the people that we loved and lost. And thinking of these moments often made me sad and sorry for myself and for you. I am so sorry my lil sis for not being a good sister and very far away from being a wonderful sister. I, sometimes thought to myself, have I ever been a sister to you and fulfilling the function of a sister, performing my task and responsibility as a sister or at least being a friend to you.
I can’t even count with my fingers, of me being nice and good to you as a sister. All that I can remembered is seeing myself scolding and being angry with you. And I felt even worst as I remembered you of not even a moment, a minute, raising your voice towards me. All that I remembered was you with the image of respecting me and obeying me as a big sis.
I remembered a day during Hari Raya when mom made us baju kurung, green colour with black polka dot. I was so angry with mom for having you and me wearing the same baju kurung. I really hated it and threw my frustration towards you although at that moment, you were still very young..... You must have been thinking, what is wrong with me....I wonder too.....forgive me for being a cruel, heartless sister....you knew me, I was always so stubborn and aggressive....hmmmmm the typical me...
Then, time flies. You and I were teenagers. I was closer to my friends than you. There are many things that I don’t know or don’t even care about you. I was busy entertaining my life. The life that I always wanted, away from our difficult life. I get so carried away and I’m really sorry if in those days, you felt like you never exist in my life. I am sorry lil sis for being so selfish and let you carry the burden of our life alone. You and mom often shared many things and sometimes I did felt jealous when mom knew more than me about you but still being me, the one so independent, repulsive, rebellious and deciding my life as I want it to be without referring to you and mom, I just don’t care much and wanted so much to be free.
But still, despite of all those years, despite of all the things that I’ve done, you were always loyal to me. You were always there for me when I needed you. You were always the one volunteered to take care of me when I was in pain. You were always there for me. You were always the one that I can count on. Thinking of this made me felt so lucky, so thankful, so grateful that I have you as my sister.
And at the same time, often made me felt bad, ashamed of myself for being such as useless sister, always not being able to be with you when you were in pain, in sadness, alone. I was never a shoulder for you to cry on. I was never there for you.......
My lil sis,
For that.....
for all those moments that I was not being like a sister to you but more like a step sister....
for all those years of pain and burden of the family that you have had on your shoulder alone....
for all those tears that you quietly wept at night.....
I am truly sorry......
I can’t turn back time....
I can’t fix those years, those moment of sadness....
I can’t repair your broken heart....
I won’t be able to do all these.
All that I can say..... I am here now. I want to be your shoulder to cry one. I want to share your joy, your happiness, your sadness. I want to be a wonderful sister. Let’s cherish our life together, let’s make things happened and enjoy every moments......
My lil sis,
Again, happy birthday! And I am your birthday present, a sister that would like to devote herself, heart and soul to take care of her lil sis.....InsyaAllah....
AYu
First and foremost, Happy Birthday! If you asked me for my wish for you, I wished for all your wishes and dreams came true, millions and countless of happiness for you to share with your loved ones, all your sadness been washed away by the falling rain and of course, all your disappointments and despair gone, in a blink of eye.
On your birthday, it often reminds me of the years that had gone by, the moments that we shared, the people that we loved and lost. And thinking of these moments often made me sad and sorry for myself and for you. I am so sorry my lil sis for not being a good sister and very far away from being a wonderful sister. I, sometimes thought to myself, have I ever been a sister to you and fulfilling the function of a sister, performing my task and responsibility as a sister or at least being a friend to you.
I can’t even count with my fingers, of me being nice and good to you as a sister. All that I can remembered is seeing myself scolding and being angry with you. And I felt even worst as I remembered you of not even a moment, a minute, raising your voice towards me. All that I remembered was you with the image of respecting me and obeying me as a big sis.
I remembered a day during Hari Raya when mom made us baju kurung, green colour with black polka dot. I was so angry with mom for having you and me wearing the same baju kurung. I really hated it and threw my frustration towards you although at that moment, you were still very young..... You must have been thinking, what is wrong with me....I wonder too.....forgive me for being a cruel, heartless sister....you knew me, I was always so stubborn and aggressive....hmmmmm the typical me...
Then, time flies. You and I were teenagers. I was closer to my friends than you. There are many things that I don’t know or don’t even care about you. I was busy entertaining my life. The life that I always wanted, away from our difficult life. I get so carried away and I’m really sorry if in those days, you felt like you never exist in my life. I am sorry lil sis for being so selfish and let you carry the burden of our life alone. You and mom often shared many things and sometimes I did felt jealous when mom knew more than me about you but still being me, the one so independent, repulsive, rebellious and deciding my life as I want it to be without referring to you and mom, I just don’t care much and wanted so much to be free.
But still, despite of all those years, despite of all the things that I’ve done, you were always loyal to me. You were always there for me when I needed you. You were always the one volunteered to take care of me when I was in pain. You were always there for me. You were always the one that I can count on. Thinking of this made me felt so lucky, so thankful, so grateful that I have you as my sister.
And at the same time, often made me felt bad, ashamed of myself for being such as useless sister, always not being able to be with you when you were in pain, in sadness, alone. I was never a shoulder for you to cry on. I was never there for you.......
My lil sis,
For that.....
for all those moments that I was not being like a sister to you but more like a step sister....
for all those years of pain and burden of the family that you have had on your shoulder alone....
for all those tears that you quietly wept at night.....
I am truly sorry......
I can’t turn back time....
I can’t fix those years, those moment of sadness....
I can’t repair your broken heart....
I won’t be able to do all these.
All that I can say..... I am here now. I want to be your shoulder to cry one. I want to share your joy, your happiness, your sadness. I want to be a wonderful sister. Let’s cherish our life together, let’s make things happened and enjoy every moments......
My lil sis,
Again, happy birthday! And I am your birthday present, a sister that would like to devote herself, heart and soul to take care of her lil sis.....InsyaAllah....
AYu
Just take my heart
It's late at night and neither one of us is sleeping
I can't imagine living my life after you're gone
Wondering why so many questions have no answers
I keep on searching for the reason why we went wrong
Where is our yesterday
You and I could use it right now
But if this is goodbye
Just take my heart when you go
I don't have the need for it anymore
I'll always love you, but you're too hard to hold
Just take my heart when you go
Here we are about to take the final step now
I just can't fool myself, I know there's no turing back
Face to face it's been endless conversation
But when the love is gone you're left with nothing but talk
I'd give my everything
If only I could turn you around
But if this is goodbye
Just take my heart when you go
I don't have the need for it anymore
I'll always love you but you're too hard to hold
Just take my heart when you go
Mr Big - Just take my heart
I can't imagine living my life after you're gone
Wondering why so many questions have no answers
I keep on searching for the reason why we went wrong
Where is our yesterday
You and I could use it right now
But if this is goodbye
Just take my heart when you go
I don't have the need for it anymore
I'll always love you, but you're too hard to hold
Just take my heart when you go
Here we are about to take the final step now
I just can't fool myself, I know there's no turing back
Face to face it's been endless conversation
But when the love is gone you're left with nothing but talk
I'd give my everything
If only I could turn you around
But if this is goodbye
Just take my heart when you go
I don't have the need for it anymore
I'll always love you but you're too hard to hold
Just take my heart when you go
Mr Big - Just take my heart
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Developed and developing??
The last few days, I’ve spent it at the hospital with my husband, accompanying him. He got stone at the kidney. He was in Putrajaya when he felt the pain. Hearing about his pain and having sent to the hospital was enough to make me worried so much. Even though I knew that his friends were taking good care of him, I am still very worried and can’t wait to be with him.
Due to this stone thing, he had to undergo a minor operation. Again, I was worried. Will the operation be okay? What if anything bad happened during the operation and etc.
Hah.....this tiny test to us had made us worried so much. What about those in Japan? They are facing a much greater challenge than us. Hence, the ability of the Japanese to stay calm and relax in facing this disaster test is amazing. And yes, we have to admit, they are, the peoples of a developed country. Today, they proved that they are a developed country and so as the citizens, all developed and matured.
As you knew Japan too, is a country with high technology. Again, I admired them. Imagine their life is in a very high technology environment where all you need to do is to push a button and things will move. From house, to work place and even the toilet, with one button push or sometimes don’t even have to push any button, using sensors, things will be automatically done. Thus, then after having this kind of life, you were push to enter an environment without electricity and water, will you be able to remain calm? The Japanese did.
They have proved that they are able to still survive this kind of situation apart from their-so-called-pampered-life. Can you imagine if this disaster took place in Malaysia? Can you imagine how we react? Hmmmm.........that is why we are developing country and not developed country...
I am not sure on how the Japanese having this good attitude. Since they are not really religious, thus, I believed, that they are well-trained. The Japanese leaders’ had a perfect mould to mould the citizens into this good shape. I remembered when our ex PM, Mahathir was talking about Wawasan 2020, having citizens in our own mould. I believed, he was talking about having a developed citizen and not only developed country by 2020. Of course, how could we have a developed country without first having a developed citizen. In fact, we need a developed citizen first, prior to the developed country.
But looking at Malaysia’s current condition of development, I am not really sure whether we are moving the right way. Don’t really see the human development program or any educational method of developing the citizens into a developed-country- citizen being done. And I am not sure whether we have a mould? Do we know what we want to be? And are we moving towards Wawasan 2020, or with a new leader now, had Wawasan 2020 been banish? And here we are, 1 Malaysia. Or the leader now is just interested with educating the public on road traffic regulations by giving summons....thus, other than that, nothing else matter....
I can still see peoples throwing rubbish out of their car window, hence I believed we are far behind, to catch up with 2020. Shall we bid farewell to 2020 and come out with the new targets? Well, who actually cares about this? The government? The peoples? I won’t blame the Malaysian citizen if they don’t care.
I knew, Malaysians are busy coping with the increase of price of the mandatory life needs, such as food. In order to cope with the high living expenses, adults have to spend more time at work to gain extra money. Due to this, less time spend with family. Thus, leading to higher rate of broken-family-institution and hence, more abandoned children.
So, our next generation, will be mostly children from broken or half-broken-family. And with this, do we still talk about being a developed country?
Okay, I’ll stop writing now.....enough said neh....let’s stop complaining and do our part. We are all grown up and we knew what we have to do. So, people.....let’s move it.....we certainly don’t want a real tsunami to come to us and then only we learn a lesson, don’t we.....
AYu
Due to this stone thing, he had to undergo a minor operation. Again, I was worried. Will the operation be okay? What if anything bad happened during the operation and etc.
Hah.....this tiny test to us had made us worried so much. What about those in Japan? They are facing a much greater challenge than us. Hence, the ability of the Japanese to stay calm and relax in facing this disaster test is amazing. And yes, we have to admit, they are, the peoples of a developed country. Today, they proved that they are a developed country and so as the citizens, all developed and matured.
As you knew Japan too, is a country with high technology. Again, I admired them. Imagine their life is in a very high technology environment where all you need to do is to push a button and things will move. From house, to work place and even the toilet, with one button push or sometimes don’t even have to push any button, using sensors, things will be automatically done. Thus, then after having this kind of life, you were push to enter an environment without electricity and water, will you be able to remain calm? The Japanese did.
They have proved that they are able to still survive this kind of situation apart from their-so-called-pampered-life. Can you imagine if this disaster took place in Malaysia? Can you imagine how we react? Hmmmm.........that is why we are developing country and not developed country...
I am not sure on how the Japanese having this good attitude. Since they are not really religious, thus, I believed, that they are well-trained. The Japanese leaders’ had a perfect mould to mould the citizens into this good shape. I remembered when our ex PM, Mahathir was talking about Wawasan 2020, having citizens in our own mould. I believed, he was talking about having a developed citizen and not only developed country by 2020. Of course, how could we have a developed country without first having a developed citizen. In fact, we need a developed citizen first, prior to the developed country.
But looking at Malaysia’s current condition of development, I am not really sure whether we are moving the right way. Don’t really see the human development program or any educational method of developing the citizens into a developed-country- citizen being done. And I am not sure whether we have a mould? Do we know what we want to be? And are we moving towards Wawasan 2020, or with a new leader now, had Wawasan 2020 been banish? And here we are, 1 Malaysia. Or the leader now is just interested with educating the public on road traffic regulations by giving summons....thus, other than that, nothing else matter....
I can still see peoples throwing rubbish out of their car window, hence I believed we are far behind, to catch up with 2020. Shall we bid farewell to 2020 and come out with the new targets? Well, who actually cares about this? The government? The peoples? I won’t blame the Malaysian citizen if they don’t care.
I knew, Malaysians are busy coping with the increase of price of the mandatory life needs, such as food. In order to cope with the high living expenses, adults have to spend more time at work to gain extra money. Due to this, less time spend with family. Thus, leading to higher rate of broken-family-institution and hence, more abandoned children.
So, our next generation, will be mostly children from broken or half-broken-family. And with this, do we still talk about being a developed country?
Okay, I’ll stop writing now.....enough said neh....let’s stop complaining and do our part. We are all grown up and we knew what we have to do. So, people.....let’s move it.....we certainly don’t want a real tsunami to come to us and then only we learn a lesson, don’t we.....
AYu
Monday, March 7, 2011
A letter of complaint
After receiving the letter from Takaful Ikhlas Sdn Bhd, that Adibah's insurance application is rejected, I was so piss off. It's written in the letter that the application is rejected because of her health condition. I totally did not understand what this mean?
Are they referring to my child deaf-blindness? She is not eligible to obtain the medical card because of her deaf-blindness? What were they thinking? That they will facing a big loss because Adibah will regularly admitted to the hospital because of her deaf-blindness. I couldn't believed this is happening. She is having that deaf-blindness since born. It is a congenital defect, a god's gift. And I totally understood that congenital defects is not covered. I'm not that stupid. They can easily explained to me in a very simple manner.
But no, they did not. They straight away rejected her application. Thus, I wrote a letter of complaint and emailed it this morning. I can always keep quite and pretend this never happened and just go to other insurance service provider but it hurts me more. I am certain that what is done by this insurance company, is not a correct and is not the right thing. Especially when you are promoting an Insurance scheme under the name of Takaful, under the brand of Islam and then you refuse to assist a multiple disable kid and rejected her straight away with no further question ask? Hah.....this is so absurd....
From: RAHAYU BINTI RAZAK
Sent: Mon 3/7/2011 9:40 AM
To: ikhlascare@takaful-ikhlas.com.my
Subject: A letter of complaint
Salam.
My name is Rahayu Razak. The purpose of writing this email is to express my disapointment and hence request for action to be taken by Takaful Ikhlas Sdn Bhd.
Early this year, I applied for Takaful Insurance Coverage for my family, including my special child Nurul Adibah Md Ashraf. Last week, I received a letter dated 11 Feb 2011, received by my agent on 23 Feb 2011. The application for Nurul Adibah Md Ashraf (application number - HS1181081) is rejected with the reason written in the letter - Permohonan ditolak kerana keadaaan kesihatan peserta. I am so disapointted with this decision. And I do not understand why is the insurance application rejected because of my child health condition.
First
I wondered how do your company decide on my child's health condition without seeing the medical report. Together with the application, I only submitted Borang pendaftaran dan cadangan penempatan kanak-kanak keperluan khas (0-18 tahun). And in this form it is only stated that my child is having a profound hearing impairment and blind. In other words, my child is deaf-blind.
And the diagnose in the 2nd page written Learning Disorder with Visual impairment. There is no any phrase in the form describing my child's health condition.
Second
My child is currently 6 years old. Previously, I have no insurance issues on hospitalization because I and my family is covered under my company, a MNC in Kulim Hi-tech Park. The insurance under this MNC is Tokio Marine. As fas as I can remembered, Tokio Marine has no issues in providing insurance for my special child as they clearly informed me that congenital defect is not covered. Other than that, there is no problem. And yes, it is very true, whenever Adibah was admitted to Gleneagles Medical Center is Penang due to fever, Tokio Marine had never asked any question. It is fully covered.
However, I then changed job. I worked in SIRIM as a contract worker and thus, only me is covered under insurance and not my family. That is why I was looking for insurance coverage for my family.
And being a Muslim, I applied for Takaful Insurance as I strongly believed that it is my responsibility to support Takaful Insurance provider. However, having this result, I can't help feeling that my child, a orang kurang upaya being discriminate by a Takaful Insurance provider. That of course does not sounds good to the society.
Third
I applied for insurance for the whole family. Thus, when your company rejected my daughter's application, why I was not informed earlier, before you approved the other family members' application. Why do think that I am still interested with your company after such discrimination? Hence, I would like to cancel all the other insurance policy and get my money back. And along the process, me and my other family members should still be under your coverage.
Should the details that had been submitted to you on my child's condition is not sufficient for you to make decision on the application, why in the first place you did not come back to me and request for more informations. I have a medical report from Pakar Perunding Pediatrik in GH Penang saying that other than deaf-blind, my child does not have any other health issues or difficulties.
This situation is totally unacceptable and hence, as a customer please attend to my request, as stated above immediately.
Regards,
Rahayu
Are they referring to my child deaf-blindness? She is not eligible to obtain the medical card because of her deaf-blindness? What were they thinking? That they will facing a big loss because Adibah will regularly admitted to the hospital because of her deaf-blindness. I couldn't believed this is happening. She is having that deaf-blindness since born. It is a congenital defect, a god's gift. And I totally understood that congenital defects is not covered. I'm not that stupid. They can easily explained to me in a very simple manner.
But no, they did not. They straight away rejected her application. Thus, I wrote a letter of complaint and emailed it this morning. I can always keep quite and pretend this never happened and just go to other insurance service provider but it hurts me more. I am certain that what is done by this insurance company, is not a correct and is not the right thing. Especially when you are promoting an Insurance scheme under the name of Takaful, under the brand of Islam and then you refuse to assist a multiple disable kid and rejected her straight away with no further question ask? Hah.....this is so absurd....
From: RAHAYU BINTI RAZAK
Sent: Mon 3/7/2011 9:40 AM
To: ikhlascare@takaful-ikhlas.com.my
Subject: A letter of complaint
Salam.
My name is Rahayu Razak. The purpose of writing this email is to express my disapointment and hence request for action to be taken by Takaful Ikhlas Sdn Bhd.
Early this year, I applied for Takaful Insurance Coverage for my family, including my special child Nurul Adibah Md Ashraf. Last week, I received a letter dated 11 Feb 2011, received by my agent on 23 Feb 2011. The application for Nurul Adibah Md Ashraf (application number - HS1181081) is rejected with the reason written in the letter - Permohonan ditolak kerana keadaaan kesihatan peserta. I am so disapointted with this decision. And I do not understand why is the insurance application rejected because of my child health condition.
First
I wondered how do your company decide on my child's health condition without seeing the medical report. Together with the application, I only submitted Borang pendaftaran dan cadangan penempatan kanak-kanak keperluan khas (0-18 tahun). And in this form it is only stated that my child is having a profound hearing impairment and blind. In other words, my child is deaf-blind.
And the diagnose in the 2nd page written Learning Disorder with Visual impairment. There is no any phrase in the form describing my child's health condition.
Second
My child is currently 6 years old. Previously, I have no insurance issues on hospitalization because I and my family is covered under my company, a MNC in Kulim Hi-tech Park. The insurance under this MNC is Tokio Marine. As fas as I can remembered, Tokio Marine has no issues in providing insurance for my special child as they clearly informed me that congenital defect is not covered. Other than that, there is no problem. And yes, it is very true, whenever Adibah was admitted to Gleneagles Medical Center is Penang due to fever, Tokio Marine had never asked any question. It is fully covered.
However, I then changed job. I worked in SIRIM as a contract worker and thus, only me is covered under insurance and not my family. That is why I was looking for insurance coverage for my family.
And being a Muslim, I applied for Takaful Insurance as I strongly believed that it is my responsibility to support Takaful Insurance provider. However, having this result, I can't help feeling that my child, a orang kurang upaya being discriminate by a Takaful Insurance provider. That of course does not sounds good to the society.
Third
I applied for insurance for the whole family. Thus, when your company rejected my daughter's application, why I was not informed earlier, before you approved the other family members' application. Why do think that I am still interested with your company after such discrimination? Hence, I would like to cancel all the other insurance policy and get my money back. And along the process, me and my other family members should still be under your coverage.
Should the details that had been submitted to you on my child's condition is not sufficient for you to make decision on the application, why in the first place you did not come back to me and request for more informations. I have a medical report from Pakar Perunding Pediatrik in GH Penang saying that other than deaf-blind, my child does not have any other health issues or difficulties.
This situation is totally unacceptable and hence, as a customer please attend to my request, as stated above immediately.
Regards,
Rahayu
Friday, January 14, 2011
To end the clueless phase of life
It has been quite some time since I wrote something here....busy? No. Busy body? Yes :)
I did not write anything because I am in the clueless phase. Again, me, myself, being the typical me...like to have a high expectation on myself. Hence again, I was thinking, am I doing what I am suppose to do in my life? Is this the kind of life that I want? Why this kind of life? Why this ordinary life? When I think I deserve an extravaganza life. Why am I being normal? When I can be special. Why I choose this path and not the other path? Why am I downgrading myself in my own career path? Why and why and endless......of why.......
After a few weeks of thinking, I found myself drowned, demotivated, not happy (inside) and confused. Felt like something is missing....hmmm what is missing? Guess what.....I stop planning :0
I wondered why do I stop planning. You can’t stop planning your life....ones needs to plan, to have vision, mission, objective, targets in life. I stop planning because I don’t know what I want to be..... haiya....after 33 years of life, I still don’t know what I want to be? How pathetic....pity me.
To make things even worst, I took Afiq to bowling class weekly. At Afiq’s bowling class, I felt even sad and jealous and envy towards Afiq’s bowling coach. He looks happy, he looks like he loves his job, he teaches and plays at the same time. He loves kids. He is good at bowling.....what else would he want....I am so jealous.....incredibly jealous!!
That is what I want. To be incredibly good at something that I really love......
So, next I was thinking....hmmm...what are the things that I am good at? I have a good degree, I am a certified quality engineer by the American Society of Quality, I’ve been a boss to a group of engineers and technicians in a multinational company, but what am I good at? At home, I’m a mother, a wife, I have 2 lovely kids....but am I a good mother?? Oppsss.......I knew the answer, and its negative.....
After evaluating and re-evaluating, I found that I am not good at anything. I don’t have a 1 thing that I am really good at. That I can proudly say, hey....this is my territory, give it to me and I gave you excellent results. Nope....don’t have any. At home, my performance is even worst.....
Thus, after thinking and thinking and a few weeks that goes unplanned and messy and sucks....and my brain is not working properly or may be not working at all.....other than keep thinking whether I should do this? Or shouldn’t do this and this and this.....
I asked myself. What do I have? I have a fantastic husband. I have a charming son. I have a beautiful, sin-free daughter. I have a kind-hearted mother in laws. I have a supportive parents and sister. I have a great boss, I have a bunch of crazy-funky-lovely officemates.
What I do not have is a thing that I am good at, a good status in my career or I guessed, I actually do not have a career.
However, comparing to the things that I have.....I should not complaint. I am not eligible to complaint at all. I have so many things but still I am very busy thinking and wishing for the things that I don’t have. Poor me......
So, I pick up all my strength, pick all the skills that I have, picking up the professionalism that I used to practice, picking up courage, love and knowledge.
I have made a resolution.
I am going to be good in anything that I touch....anything.....
As a muslim, as a life partner, as a mother, as a daughter, as an employee, as a friend......I am going to be good because I knew how to be good and I want to be good. All I need is to put effort and to practice all the skills and knowledge that I have towards these goals....and of course, I will plan my life towards these objectives.
Remember, success is not a destination, it’s a journey!! So enjoy the journey.....
AYu
I did not write anything because I am in the clueless phase. Again, me, myself, being the typical me...like to have a high expectation on myself. Hence again, I was thinking, am I doing what I am suppose to do in my life? Is this the kind of life that I want? Why this kind of life? Why this ordinary life? When I think I deserve an extravaganza life. Why am I being normal? When I can be special. Why I choose this path and not the other path? Why am I downgrading myself in my own career path? Why and why and endless......of why.......
After a few weeks of thinking, I found myself drowned, demotivated, not happy (inside) and confused. Felt like something is missing....hmmm what is missing? Guess what.....I stop planning :0
I wondered why do I stop planning. You can’t stop planning your life....ones needs to plan, to have vision, mission, objective, targets in life. I stop planning because I don’t know what I want to be..... haiya....after 33 years of life, I still don’t know what I want to be? How pathetic....pity me.
To make things even worst, I took Afiq to bowling class weekly. At Afiq’s bowling class, I felt even sad and jealous and envy towards Afiq’s bowling coach. He looks happy, he looks like he loves his job, he teaches and plays at the same time. He loves kids. He is good at bowling.....what else would he want....I am so jealous.....incredibly jealous!!
That is what I want. To be incredibly good at something that I really love......
So, next I was thinking....hmmm...what are the things that I am good at? I have a good degree, I am a certified quality engineer by the American Society of Quality, I’ve been a boss to a group of engineers and technicians in a multinational company, but what am I good at? At home, I’m a mother, a wife, I have 2 lovely kids....but am I a good mother?? Oppsss.......I knew the answer, and its negative.....
After evaluating and re-evaluating, I found that I am not good at anything. I don’t have a 1 thing that I am really good at. That I can proudly say, hey....this is my territory, give it to me and I gave you excellent results. Nope....don’t have any. At home, my performance is even worst.....
Thus, after thinking and thinking and a few weeks that goes unplanned and messy and sucks....and my brain is not working properly or may be not working at all.....other than keep thinking whether I should do this? Or shouldn’t do this and this and this.....
I asked myself. What do I have? I have a fantastic husband. I have a charming son. I have a beautiful, sin-free daughter. I have a kind-hearted mother in laws. I have a supportive parents and sister. I have a great boss, I have a bunch of crazy-funky-lovely officemates.
What I do not have is a thing that I am good at, a good status in my career or I guessed, I actually do not have a career.
However, comparing to the things that I have.....I should not complaint. I am not eligible to complaint at all. I have so many things but still I am very busy thinking and wishing for the things that I don’t have. Poor me......
So, I pick up all my strength, pick all the skills that I have, picking up the professionalism that I used to practice, picking up courage, love and knowledge.
I have made a resolution.
I am going to be good in anything that I touch....anything.....
As a muslim, as a life partner, as a mother, as a daughter, as an employee, as a friend......I am going to be good because I knew how to be good and I want to be good. All I need is to put effort and to practice all the skills and knowledge that I have towards these goals....and of course, I will plan my life towards these objectives.
Remember, success is not a destination, it’s a journey!! So enjoy the journey.....
AYu
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)