What will you do if you hate someone??

What will you do if you hate someone?? Do you runaway from him/her? You try not to be at the same place with him/her? You avoid using the same route that he does so that you will not bump into him? You, of course try to not to have any conversation with him/her?

But if he is your boss….He is someone that you will have to deal with everyday…he is a family members that you can’t escape whenever there’s a family gathering. And you often feel like you wanna bite him, wanna scream to his face….

If you were in this situation, first you need to check on whether only you alone having these issues with him or he is confirmed to be such a nuisance and a lot of people also having issues with him and you were just his favourite target….this is the number one fact that you need to clear of because it leads to different kind of action.

IT’S ONLY YOU…

So, after you are clear and the answer is, you found that you were the only person that have issues with him. So, next, what you need to do is that, you need to check on yourself first. There are possibilities that it’s you, actually having the problems. It’s something in you that make you hate him or make him hate you. Look deeply, because sometimes we are just not able to see our own wrongdoings that have lead the other person to react in such a negative way towards you. Once you found the error, fix it. End.

If after you look deeply and still you found nothing, the next wise thing to do, is to have a crucial conversation with that person. The idea is that, you would like to stop hating him and stop talking behind his back and stop running away from him, because it is just not healthy to continue hating a person, and it makes you tired and exhausted too. For a crucial conversation, you can start by describing your dissatisfactions on how he treat you that resulted with you, everyday, trying to avoid and running away from him and that now you are tired. So, you would like to solve the issue, improve the relationship and you need feedback from him on the actions that you may be able to take to improve the relationship. And to find ways, to fix the error so that both of you will be able to live in peace and harmony. Once you get the feedbacks and the method, work on it. End.

EVERYBODY HATES HIM

This is easy, stop hating him. The rational is that, he is not even worth to be hate. In fact, you should be pity on him for he has some “screw loose” at his head causing him acting in such a nuisance ways towards everybody. So, how to do it… Whenever, he is trying to act or speak in an annoying manner, what you need to do is to stay in silence, smile and think in your head, that pity him, for he had a “screw loose” in his head, causing him mentally unstable and forgive him for that  With this, you won’t hate him, his words or act will not hurt your feelings, your blood pressure will not increase, and you lose nothing and you’re happy 

However, if you can’t felt sorry for him, try not to be like him. For example, if he shout at you or said harsh words to you, don’t reply him back with the same manner. Because you certainly don’t want to demonstrate that you are also having some “screw loose”, don’t you ;0

Ayu

Tertipu juga aku

Tertipu juga aku
Walau telah banyak juga ilmu yang aku tahu
Walau beribu batu telah aku pergi memburu
Walau telah banyak guru-guruku memberi ilmu
Namun tertipu juga aku
Kerana aku membenarkan diriku tertipu

Tertipu juga aku
Bukan kerana kebodohanku
Bukan kerana pendeknya akalku
Bukan juga kerana kurangnya pengalamanku
Tetapi aku tertipu kerana itu pilihanku

Tertipu juga aku
Tertawan apabila meneguk manisnya madu
Tenggelam dalam keseronokan palsu
Dan aku jadi kelabu
Dalam menentukan arus hidupku
Lalu arus yang penuh debu, tipu, palsu
Itu jua yang jadi pilihanku
Dan yang terlalu memilukan aku
Kerana aku tahu
Tetapi aku tetap membiarkan diriku tertipu

Poligami??

Di penghujung zaman ini, wanita semakin ramai. Adakah poligami merupakan jalan penyelesaiannya? Betapa hebatnya Allah SAW…….

Aku sering kali tertanya-tanya, mengapa begitu sukar untuk wanita menerima poligami. Ianya sesuatu yang telah dicipta hukumnya oleh Allah SAW, tetapi mengapa begitu ramai yang menentang, yang sukar menerima, yang telah memberi amaran kepada suami-suami mereka untuk tidak berpoligami malah menyebut tentang poligami pun tidak dibenarkan.

Aku juga seorang wanita. Dan aku juga sering berfikir, sekiranya ujian ini menimpaku, adakah aku boleh menerimanya? Redha dengan pemberian Ilahi? Suatu malam aku telah bermimpi yang suamiku datang bertemu denganku bersama seorang wanita. Suamiku menyatakan hasratnya untuk berkahwin lagi. Melihat suamiku memegang tangan wanita itu telah membuat aku hilang kata-kata dan mengeluarkan air mata. Hancur luluh hatiku hanya kerana melihat suamiku memegang tangan wanita itu. Bagaimana pula nanti sekiranya mereka berkahwin? Aku menangis semahunya dan merasakan dadaku sesak sehingga aku terjaga dalam keadaan masih menangis. Fikirku patutlah, ramai wanita tidak rela dimadu…..

Namun aku berfikir lagi……adakah layak untuk aku tidak membenarkan suamiku berpoligami hanya kerana memenangkan rasa cemburuku? Hanya kerana aku tidak merelakan wanita lain memegang suamiku, bermanja dengan suamiku, berkongsi kasih dengan suamiku?

Aku masih berpijak di bumi nyata. Aku bukan sahaja seorang isteri, ibu, anak, tetapi aku juga seorang teman, seorang sahabat kepada rakan-rakanku. Aku mempunyai ramai teman wanita yang masih tidak mendirikan rumahtangga. Kebanyakan rakan wanitaku ini berkerjaya, sudah memiliki rumah dan kereta sendiri, cuma tiada suami. Mengapa mereka tidak berkahwin? Begitu sukar untuk mencari lelaki bujang yang berkelayakan menjadi suami? Memang benarpun, sudahlah spesies lelaki makin menyusut, yang ada pulak ramai dah masuk pusat serenti dan yang selebihnya memilih untuk jadi mak nyah pula…Maka tidak hairanlah kalau bilangan lelaki bujang yang berkelayakan semakin berkurangan. Menurut teman-temanku lagi, kalau suami orang, ramai yang boleh dibuat calon…dan ramai yang ingin memperisterikan teman-temanku ini terdiri dari suami orang. Namun benar juga, sukar untuk menerima lamaran mereka sekiranya isteri-isteri mereka tidak membenarkan.

Dan lazimnya memang isteri mereka tidak membenarkan dengan alasan bimbang suami mereka tidak dapat berlaku adil dan bimbang hak-hak mereka akan dirampas. Betul juga alasan ini kerana kebanyakan suami yang ingin berpoligami kini, hanya kerana menunaikan tuntutan nafsu, tanggungjawab dan sebagainya diletakkan di senarai terakhir. Maklumlah, bak pepatah orang puteh “Love is blind”. Inilah yang mencemarkan nama poligami. Dan apabila wanita menolak poligami, janganlah hanya wanita yang dipersalahkan.

Bercakap mengenai hak-hak isteri, bagaimana pula hak-hak wanita bujang zaman ini? Adakah kita menafikan hak mereka? Jika mereka ingin mempunyai keluarga sendiri, anak sendiri, ingin memenuhi naluri mereka sebagai seorang manusia, ingin merasakan betapa indahnya mengandungkan anak sendiri………bagaimana? Sekiranya lelaki yang bujang dan berkelayakan telah semakin kurang bilangannya berbanding wanita bujang dan lelaki berkelayakan dan sudah berkahwin pula tidak dibenarkan berkahwin lagi….adakah kita akan menyuruh teman kita yang belum berkahwin, sudah bergelar andartu untuk menerima takdir mereka seadanya yang mereka akan membujang sepanjang hayat? Atau apabila mereka terjerumus ke lembah maksiat kita akan berkata yang itu bukan masalah kita. Memang mudah untuk berkata-kata. Aku pernah mendengar kata-kata seorang teman, kesunyian itu juga satu kemiskinan.

Jika aku meletakkan diri aku di tempat seorang isteri yang akan menghadapi poligami, aku tentu akan bimbang adakah aku mampu untuk menerima seorang wanita lain untuk berkongsi kasih dengan suamiku? Berkongsi katil dengan suamiku? Adakah suamiku akan masih menyayangiku? Adakah suamiku akan masih mengasihi anak-anakku?

Jika aku meletakkan diriku di tempat seorang wanita yang telah mempunyai segala-galanya melainkan suami, aku tentu inginkan belaian kasih sayang seorang suami, aku tentu inginkan sebuah keluarga, aku tentu ingin bergelar seorang ibu. Dan aku tentu berasa sunyi apabila pulang ke rumah yang kosong setelah pulang dari tempat kerja…..

Hanya Allah SAW juga yang lebih mengetahui, setiap sesuatu yang terjadi pasti ada hikmahnya. Setiap sesuatu yang telah Dia tentukan pasti yang terbaik untuk hambaNya.

Sekiranya, tiba masa, suamiku terpilih olehNya untuk menjalankan poligami, aku berharap agar aku akan diberi kekuatan untuk menghadapinya. Aku berharap agar aku akan dapat menyokong suamiku untuk melaksanakan tanggungjawabnya. Aku berharap agar aku akan sentiasa sedar yang cinta nombor satu hanyalah cinta pada Allah SAW. Bukan sahaja untuk menghadapi poligami malah untuk mengharungi setiap saat dalam kehidupan ini. Kerana aku hanyalah hambaNYa yang lemah, hina lagi tidak berdaya.

AYu

Its my birthday!!!

Today is my birthday! So, today I am going to share on something that I always like to talk about……big dreams.

Do you have big dreams? Or you often have nightmare until you forgot to dream? Or you don’t dare to dream. Dreams are free so you can have the biggest dream, the wildest dream, the mission-impossible-dream and the whatever-you-like dreams, of course anything that you want.

The facts are
1) Dreams are free
2) You can dream of anything you want
3) Nobody can limit your dream other than yourself
4) Like the internet, dream has no limits too

So, knowing all these facts, why are we so afraid to dreams…..are we scared that we may not be able to achieve our dream? Well, another fact is that, if you have big dreams but no action taken to reach the dream, don’t worry…..your dream will remain a dream. It will not come true. If its come true, it is simply because you’re the lucky one. But you have to remember that the percentage of being lucky is very thin. So, chances are, you are not the lucky one, so your dream will remain a dream. This is what the malay saying “angan-angan mat jenin”. Only dreams…..

However, if you have dreams, you actually already on Step 1 of being an enthusiastic, positive, high motivation, brave, successful person. Because you dare to dream. Often when a person has big dreams and they are smart, they shall put a ladder on to achieve that dream. Like what Frankly covey said in 7 habit, habit # 2, begin with the end in mind. You shall have to put what you have in mind (in your dreams into a blue print). Why did he said blue print and not drawing or writing or painting? Its blue print because it must be very detail and precise.

Blue prints are normally used for a plan of a building or a machine. So, it must very details and precise, or else you will never get to build the building or the get the machine to perform its function. So, as dreams. If you did not translated your dreams into a blue print, there are high possibilities that you are still not able to see your dreams clearly, you are not sure of what you really want. Therefore, you will not achieve it. Of course, when the targets are not clear, how are you going to throw the darts?

Okay, so everybody clear? Step 2 is to put the dreams into a blue print. I am also still did not have that blue print ……..and the more pathetic thing is, I kept wondering every day, why my dreams remain dreams…haiya…....

Dreams, hope, will get you to go through life will full of spirit, happier, high motivation, positive. So don’t stop dreaming. But of course la….don’t get lost in your dream until you’re not stepping in the real world.

For my birthday, one of my dreams is that my husband will come to wish me a Happy Birthday, with a good-delicious-birthday cake and the present is a fully-furnished-bungalow with modern style interior design, at a very strategic area….ahahaha…..I love dreaming :)

All the best!! See you at step 3 :)

AYu

Sometimes, we just have to look down...

When we first knew about Adibah, that she is a special child with a special syndrome that until today is still under investigation and is still unknown, we were blur, speechless....its been a week that both of us were in deep silence.

But then, enough of this silence and blur thing, we need to move on very fast as we need to fix Adibah's heart or she has the chance of dying due to pneumonia. The blood vessel at the heart is with hole and thus blood goes to the lung which then can contaminated the lungs, and she will suffer for pneumonia.

I just can't wait. I wanted the operation to be done soonest possible. I am just too worried that I may lost her and our target at that time, is just to fix the heart and save her...

But still, I guessed we were preety tough, Alhamdullilah for all the strength that He has given us.

However, continuing life with the fact that your child is very different from a normal child, is not something easy. There is one time, an officemate delivered a healthy, normal baby girl. Everyone in the office pay her a visit, but I did not. And it was just because at that time, it just hurt my feelings very much seeing other people having a normal child.

And then the people closest to us also having healthy normal child, came Dania, Danish...all beautiful, healthy normal babies. Not that I wished that they had a child like mine...no its not that...I just hope that Adibah is also as beautiful, normal, healthy like them....and later that I realised, am I still not able to accept the fact that Adibah is a special one? That I had a child with a really rare syndrome that makes her not able to grow at the speed of a normal baby, not able to hear, to see??

It hurts me, because I look up.....when I looked down, I met Gilbert, a ten years old child, feeding through a tube, not able to move anywhere on his own. I met a few friends that to me are much less fortunate than I am. These friends, also have a special child and at the same time, they are poor. They don't have enough money to give their child, his/her special needs.

Hah....I am so grateful.....Adibah may not be able to see, to hear, but she can still smile. She can still move - in her own style. We still have enough money, to buy the best things for her....and with this, am I still not grateful???

And after I had Adibah, I can feel that I am different person. I changed a lot. I appreciate life more, I am so motivated to continue living, doing the best for her and for other child like her. By the way, how can I'd be not motivated when Adibah, a deaf-blind, is so highly-motivated to continue on living even though the world is not for her. She continued learning, even though her learning pace is very very very slow.

So, sometimes, we need to look down and have a very high faith in Allah SAW. For everything that he gave us, are the best.....

Bercintalah berkali-kali!

Got this article from Majalah Solusi. A good article. Down here is only a portion of the article, to read more, buy the magazinelah....:)

Cinta itu perlu diperbaharui. Perbaharuilah cinta dengan luahan kata-kata yang baik. Jangan membisu, jangan menjadi tuli. Sentiasa jadi lidah yang menuturkan kata-kata yang baik agar ada telinga yang sentiasa terbuka dan sudi mendengarnya.

Bercinta lagi...
Untuk bercinta lagi, luahkanlah kata-kata yang baik untuk mencairkan prasangka, meleburkan curiga dan memadankan dendam. Cari-carilah topik yang menarik untuk diperbualkan. Antara kaedahnya ialah:

1) Berdoa untuk Allah ilhamkan kata-kata yang baik dan menarik semasa memulakan perbualan.
2) Menerima dan berkongsi hobi dengan pasangan.
3) Ulas apa yang anda dengar, lihat atau baca dengan pasangan serta kaitkan dengan situasi terkini dalam rumahtangga.
4) Sekali-sekala masak bersama resipi kesukaannya.
5) Jangan prasangka dan curiga, dan selalu memaafkan, selagi pasangan tidak melanggar syariat.
6) Amalkan peraturan 24 jam. Jangan biarkan "gencatan suara" melebihi 24 jam. Mujahadahlah untuk meminta maaf secara rasmi atau tidak rasmi.
7) Tempoh-tempoh yang dirasakan sukar dalam perhubungan hendaklah diisi dengan amalan habluminnallah seperti solat, munajat dan taubat. Jangan selesaikan masalah dengan satu masalah lain.

Adibah, my darling....

I am so glad this week as Adibah already fully recovered from her sickness. Often when she is sick, I am sick too. I am always over worried on her. I am worried that she''ll be sick and we have to stay at the hospital and she'll be gone, leaving me forever. May be it sounded like paranoid but I can still hear a pediatrician said that may be she won't live long. I can still hear the words. So, when she is sick I always blame myself for not being able to avoid her from being sick....I always do.....

Yes, she's a special child and even if she's gone, I have nothing to loose, isn'it? It will be better as I do not have to take care of her, do not have to go through all the hassle of raising her....

But still I couldn't imagine being without her. A day without kissing her, already a pain in the heart. What if not seeing her forever?? Even though she is like that, she is not normal, she is deaf blind, she can't walk and you have to carry her around, she cried out loud until you touch her, she always bite your finges, she won't eat the medicine, she make noises in public and everyone will look at you with that "sympathy look"....but still, I love her....I guessed, all mothers will have the same feelings when it comes to their children. If given option, all mothers will not want to loose their children.

But still it is not ours to decide. I do hope that when the day comes, Allah saw will give me strength to accept it, to deal with it. For He has given me and my family, all the strength to have Adibah, He has given all the happiness, even though we have Adibah. Or if I'll be leaving the world for eternity, I do not have to worry about Adibah as Allah saw will surely decide and determine what is best for her and for me.

But Adibah is a zero-sin person and she will go straight to heaven. Hmmmm I should worried about myself, will I be even close to the paradise...ooh ooowww.....

AYu

Cinta Setangkai Ranting dan Sebatang Pohon

Found this from a friend's book, Anis Tasnim. I love the article.

Cinta Setangkai Ranting dan Sebatang Pokok

Suatu ketika Plato berbicara dengan gurunya. Plato bertanyakan makna cinta dan gurunya pun menjawab: "Masuklah ke dalam hutan, pilih dan ambillah satu batang ranting yang menurutmu paling baik, tetapi engkau haruslah berjalan ke depan dan janganlah kembali ke belakang. Pada saat kau sudah memutuskan pilihanmu, keluarlah dari hutan dengan ranting tersebut."

Maka masuklah Plato ke dalam hutan dan keuarlah Plato tanpa membawa sebarang ranting pun. Gurunya bertanya, maka jawab Plato: "Saya sebenarnya sudah menemukan ranting yang bagus, tetapi saya berfikir barangkali di depan saya ada ranting yang lebih baik. Tetapi setelah saya berjalan ke depan, ternyata ranting yang sudah saya tinggalkan tadilah yang terbaik. Maka saya keluar hutan tanpa membawa apa-apa.

Guru itu lalu berkata: "Itulah cinta." Lalu Plato pun bertanya apa makna perkahwinan. Guru pun menjawab: "Sama seperti ranting tadi, namun kali ini engkau haruslah membawa satu phon yang engkau fikir paling baik dan bawalah keluar dari hutan." Maka masuklah Plato ke dalam hutan dan keluarlah Plato dengan membawa pohon yang tidak terlalu tinggi juga tidak terlalu indah.

Gurunya pun bertanya, maka jawab Plato: "Saya dapati pohon yang indah daunnya, besar batangnya. Tetapi saya tak dapat memotongnya dan pastilah saya tak mampu membawanya keluar dari hutan. Akhirnya saya tinggalkan. Kemudian saya temukan pohon yang tidak terlalu buruk, tidak terlalu tinggi dan saya fikir mampu membawanya kerana mungkin saya tidak akan menemukan pohon seperti ini di depan sana.

"Akhirnya saya pilih pohon ini kerana saya yakin boleh merawatnya dna menjadikannya indah." Lalu sang guru berkata: "Itulah makna perkahwinan. Begitu banyak pilihan di depan kitaseperti pohon-pohon berserta rantingnya di dalam hutan, tapi kita mesti menentukan satu pilihan dan bila terlalu memilih, tidak satu pun akan kita dapati."

Kerana, kesempatan itu hanya datang sekali dan kita harus terus maju seperti waktu yang bergerak ke depan yang tidak pernah tersimpan pada hari kelmarin dan bersemayam pada masa lalu kita. - PUTRI

My new career

I've quit job, after almost 9 years and joined another company (for less than 2 month) and then quit again and now I am a full time housewife. The "full time" is really full. One thing I didn't know about this job is that it is a 24 hours job, 7 days a week, no annual leave, no emergency leave. Not that I did not realise it before this, but never thought that I'll be so busy and even more difficult to find time for myself. Hmmm....

For the first few month, I'm in this new career, I was so busy searching for other job because I was worried of that money matters. And to make it worst, everyone that I've meet told me that I should work and that a housewife title seems does not fit me well. And I believed what they said. I believed that I should not become a full time housewife. I'm a woman with high education, I'm doing good in my career, so how do I end up a home maker? A full time housewife? I really cannot tahan that almost everyone that I've met looked down on me and my new career. Or may be its me myself that looked down on me. No one can looked down on you, make you feel bad without your permission. So, I permitted them to make feel bad.

This new career is what I'm looking for all these years, but why am I not happy? Because I am worried about that money matters again. But I should be happy, this is my dream. I want to take care of my kids, I want to do everything with them, I want to be with them. And of course for Adibah, my special one. She needs me, very much.

Today I pick up Afiq from school. Once he entered the car, he looked back to Adibah. Kiss here and kiss her and kiss her. Yeah, I finally realise that Afiq is now closer to Adibah. He hugged her, played with her. So, as Adibah. She loved gomoi her abang. She giggles, loughes a lot when they played together. Before this, Afiq seldom got chance to play with her sister. Why? Because once I left home to office, Adibah will be gone too. I'll send her to the babysitter. I reached home at night and so as Adibah.

Looking at Afiq kissing Adibah, playing with her, listening to their lough, what else would I want?I am so happy. And if this new career can give me "these happiness", that money would not be able to buy, so be it.

I am glad and I have no regrets.

Ayu

Aug... already?

Its already Aug 2009. And Ramadhan is just around the corner. And again what have i done this year?? Its already Aug....still thinking and I think that I have wasted a lot of time on thinking what to do. Why am I taking so long to figure what to do...

Ehmmmm ilham tak mai lagi nih. Baik pi solat lah.....

To be continue...

Ayu

Arghhhh

It's already almost mid year of 2009. Hmm...where am I? What have I've done this year? There are a lot of changes with my life recently, so many changes until I think I can't adopt, can't manage these changes.

I wanted to change. But sometimes I just don't know where to start, how to start. Do a lot thinking and finally, I've decided and I'll let Him decide, what is best for me. Often you think, that you knew best what you want. And you step into it. And then you asked yourself again, is this really what you want?

And life is about making choices, but why are we so afraid to choose?

Regards,
Rahayu

Adibah

Setiap kali menatap wajahmu
Aku sayu
Aku gembira
Aku sayang padamu
Engkaulah kurniaan Tuhan yang terbaik untukku

Namun maafkan aku
kerana aku juga hanya manusia biasa
yang seringkali leka dan alpa

Tatkala dugaan melanda
Aku takut kehilanganmu
Aku tak mampu melihat kesakitanmu
Dan tika itu aku seringkali berharap
agar aku mampu mengundur waktu
mampu mengubah takdir

Namun akhirnya aku tersedar
Aku hanya hambaNya
dan kamu amanahNya untukku
yang teristimewa......

AYu

Sorry, not coming today??

Have you been a boss or you are a boss now? What are kind of boss are you? Well I have no intention to bring this further to the leadership things like whether you falls under the leaders category, or the dictator or just a superior and that sort of things....no ...not talking about that?

I would just like to talk about being a human boss...Or do you have this human element when you lead your role as a boss or you turn into a beast or monster when you become a boss or you are the understanding ones? Of course with or without you realising it...

I have been to that role to, a boss and a subordinate. When you received calls like, “Sorry can’t make it today, because my child is sick” or “My child is hospitalized so I would like to take a few days more to take care of the child”. And at that time, you have so many tasks to complete and deadlines are killing and these peoples are not coming.

Arghhh..... Have you been there? What is your response? Are these your response “Sorry you can’t take leave, if you didn’t come, you will get warning letter for absent from work without superior approval” or you just shout “Kalau tak datang berhenti je terus. Orang lain pun ada anak jugak takdela asyik ambil cuti je”..... Do you give such response?

I ‘m not going to elaborate further on how you should cope on your job with less resources but I would like to suggest that you accept the reasons, that you work in a high trust environment and that you trust your subordinate with that reasons. However, you can always ask your subordinate for evidence from the hospitals.

Because family are just too important to be ignore or to be put less priority compared to your job. Yes, you need money to feed your loves ones, but will it give any value if you lost them while searching for that money? Will it be worth it? So, if you were a boss, you better think twice before asking your subordinate to leave his/her sick child and come to work. Because if something bad happen.....do you want to be responsible? Can you live with that feeling of guilty? For me, I don’t want to.

Or may be you don’t feel anything, if something bad happen, well that’s fate so why blame you or why you should feel guilty. Well, if this is the case, let’s try this one. Imagine that you’re dying. Will you prefer to die alone and not having the chance to say goodbye or sorry to your love ones? And just waiting for your dying moment without anybody to talk to and just crying in pain alone? Or you prefer to be with your loves ones, to spend more time with them, to let them know how much you love and appreciate them? Which one?? Answer people??

And if were a subordinate, an employee, and you were in this difficult situation, struggling between work and attending a sick child or parents, if you have to choose.... Choose your loves one. Because your loves one has no replacement. And trust me, when you’re sick there is nothing else that you want more other than being with your loves one.

By the way, nobody ask or would want to a have a sick family members, isn’t?

Well, bosses, subordinates, employees, life is about making choices....
To choose may not be easy, so learn, think with heart and mind and don’t lost that common sense when you that make that choice :)

AYu

Big changes

I've been very busy lately and thus have abandoned this blog. And there are so many changes lately too. I have made the decision to quit my job and move....Well, until today, I still can't believed that I've made such decision. I couldn't believe that I've chosen these changes. I am a one person that are so scared of facing changes and now today here I am. And I have made that decision in a very short time frame. Thank you Allah saw for given me the strength and courage to find changes after so many years.

But has usual, as a mother, these changes affected my family too. I felt sorry for Afiq for he has to change school and has to start all over again with new friends, new school. But he is a tough one, my darling sweet heart.

Now for already 1month plus, I've been a full time housewife. My goodness, housewife is actually a very busy job. There are so many things to do. Luckily, my mom stayed with me and help with the house work or else.....

Now, we have to figure out on how to continue living in this new place in Selangor.....changes needs sacrifices...hah there are so many things to think about.

Till then. Let me do the thinking first.

Ayu